Laws for programmers


The law of relativity for programmers

If the program contains discrepancies between the source text and comments, then both are most likely mistaken.

Computer technology law

The use of computer technology is simply to find a suitable support that can be hammered into the right place.

Weinberg's second law

If builders built houses the way programmers write programs, the first woodpecker to fly would destroy civilization.

Hagan's law

The range of use of a computer is only within the length of its power cord.

Principle of the upgraded version of the program

As soon as you uninstall the old version of the program, the upgraded version will stop working.

Consequence

The old version cannot be re-installed.

Thompson's theory of steady state

The stable condition of the disks is that they are one hundred percent full.

Pickering's Law of Data Loss

The likelihood of a hard drive failure grows in direct proportion to the time that has passed since the moment it was last backed up.

Virus law

The ugliest virus will sit just in that single file that you have not scanned for viruses.

Cromer's Law

Digital readout provides erroneous information with higher accuracy than was previously possible.

Fineagle's laws of information

1. The information you have is not at all what you want to have.

2. The information that you want to have is not at all what you need.

3. The information you need is not at all what you are able to get.

4. The information you are able to obtain is worth much more than what you are willing to pay.

Bradley's sedative

If computers become too powerful, we can organize a commission out of them, and this will immediately sharply reduce their capabilities.

Lucas Laws.

1. The program that is most important to you will require more RAM than you have.

2. If you have enough RAM, you will run out of disk space.

3. If the program breaks into the RAM and there is enough disk space for it, then it will display an alarm message.

4. If the program works perfectly, then it is simply waiting for that critical moment, after which it will hang or issue an alarm message.

Mazur's law

No matter how low the price of the computer you buy, no later than one week after the year of purchase, you will be presented with a more powerful computer for a lower price.

Moore's Law (simplified)

Every eighteen months later, the power of computers doubles, and their prices are halved.

Perlis postulate

In the computer industry there is always a need for new stereotypes and cliches.

Perkins postulate

The online technical support system is designed to provide customers with everything except actual assistance.

The programmer's dilemma

Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to provide support for the rest of your life.

The eighth law of programming

It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.

Operating system design principles

1. Computers are a sinkhole for intelligence.

2. There is no level of genius that cannot be matched by the structural arrangement of the operating system.

Microsoft investigation

It takes hundreds of geniuses to make a simple thing difficult.

Flon's Law

There is no programming language in which it would be even more difficult to write bad programs.


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