The duration of a marriage is inversely proportional to the time spent preparing and holding a wedding.
If there is something eternal and indestructible in the world, it is not love at all, but plastic.
If you walk into the store right after your wife's birthday, you will see that the price you gave her recently has been reduced by 50 percent.
If you have a wife with you, she will think that you have chosen this little thing because of its cheapness.
The gifts you buy for your wife are never as welcome as the gifts your neighbor gives to his wife.
Whoever snores falls asleep first.
On the very day when you are ready to sell your own soul for something, it turns out that the soul market is oversaturated.
The most flattering reviews for your hair will come the day before you get your hair cut.
The wind speed increases in proportion to the cost of the hairstyle.
1. Love letters, business contracts and money owed to you always arrive three weeks late.
2. Waste advertising and other trifling mail arrives on the day it is sent.
In every family tree, John Smith from London will be found in one of the key positions.
If two are walking, then harmful insects will press only on one, leaving the other alone.
When the opportunity flips and the trumpet calls, you have headphones on your head.
High moral character is a recessive property.
Whatever happens to you, it previously happened to each of your friends.
Never go to bed with someone who has more problems than you.
The product of beauty and intelligence equals a constant.
Don't go crazy - go somewhere else.
People are divided into righteous and sinners, and the righteous divide them.
Everyone who is popular is doomed to human dislike.
Ham is a person who speaks and speaks when you want him to listen.
Sooner or later they will say about any of your successful photographs that there you are completely different from yourself.
When you finally meet the perfect woman, it turns out that she intends to wait for the perfect man.
For every "5" rating, there are actually five "1" ratings.
Never change your plans because of the weather.
1. If the weather is extremely bad, church attendance will drop.
2. If the weather is exceptionally good, church attendance will drop.
3. If the church messenger is not delivered in enough copies, the church attendance will exceed all expectations.
1. People you are attracted to invariably say that you remind them terribly of someone else.
2. The love letter that you finally have the courage to send is in the mail long enough for you to be a fool who makes fun of yourself after its delivery.
3. The romantic gestures of others look new and charming. Your own romantic gestures seem silly and awkward.