Murphy's Laws for Specialists


The fateful law of specialization

What procedure you are instructed to perform at the very beginning will become your specialty.

The first principle of specialization

What you resist, so become. (we say: "What I fought for, I ran into it")

Lemma Lipman

People specialize in the area where they are weakest.

Matz's definition

A drug is a substance that, when injected into a rat, results in a scientific report or report.

Nacer's medical law

You can protect yourself from the fool, but you cannot protect yourself from the patient.

Balfe's law

The more urgent the transfusion, the more rare the blood type.

Principle of bone marrow transplant according to Foremen

If the patient has three siblings, then the best match will be one or one of them who:

a) lives the farthest;

b) for many years, as he became a completely stranger;

c) is serving a life sentence in prison;

or

d) everything mentioned above.

Seligman's Law of Improvement

The first application of an improved treatment procedure will be of lower quality than the mastered application of a lower quality procedure.

Weber's law

A specialist is a person who knows more and more about less and less, and so on until he begins to know absolutely everything about nothing.

Barron's Law

If a doctor becomes seriously ill, it is always according to his own specialization.

Penfield's postulate

Each narrow specialist can improve his performance by becoming broader.

Jerger's dictum

It is difficult for narrow specialists to see outside their own field and it is easy to believe that their specific services are really needed.

The first rule of obstetrician-gynecologist

All babies are born between midnight and 5 a.m.

Bernie's Law

No man is a hero to his psychiatrist wife.

McGuffin's psychotherapeutic principle

It's easy to see the bright side in other people's problems.

Yong's law

Advice refers to what we ask for when we already know the answer, but would like not to know it.

Dinkin's Law for Dentists

The patient with the most bad breath speaks out the most.

Goldstein's axiom

A good dentist never starts talking until the boron is in the patient's mouth.

Lemma Bernard Shaw

A person with a toothache thinks that everyone who has good teeth is already happy.

The first law of dentistry

The worst cavity will always be in the hardest to reach tooth.

Bernstein's commandment

The national flower of radiologists and radiologists is a hedge shrub.

Dunn's Law

The most thorough preparation is by no means a substitute for silly luck.

Lew's law

If the human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be too simple to be able to understand it.

Humphrey's psychotherapeutic principle

Your customers give up good habits faster than bad ones.

Lowery's Law of Orthopedics

If anything is stiff, use force. If it breaks, it needs to be replaced anyway.

Jensen's orthopedic principle

The more famous the doctor, the longer it takes to get to see him.

Consequence

The most famous doctors never come across the most acute and urgent cases.

An exception

Jensen's principle can be circumvented if the patient has a recommendation from an even more famous doctor.

The first law of physiotherapists

The stronger the primary pain, the weaker the subsequent one.

The second law of physiotherapists

If the patient is still smiling, add another five pounds to the exercise.

Prnitsy Salk for opticians

1. The most picky client will choose a frame that has long been listed among unclaimed orders.

2. The more time spent on delicate work, the more chances that the frame will break.

3. Customers in need of long-term service enter just before closing.

4. The client will report the presence of diseases that affect the vision, after - and only after - his glasses are ready.

Sharpe's remark

Dermatology is the only area of ​​medicine where there are two hundred diseases and only three types of ointments for their treatment.

Pediatrics law

Never examine a child who is wearing cowboy boots.


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