Murphy's laws on medical research


Edington's theory

The number of different hypotheses put forward to explain a given biological phenomenon is inversely proportional to the number of known facts about it.

Law of Science Development According to Say

Sometimes it takes several years to recognize the obvious.

Harvard law

With the most stringent control of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity and other variables, the body will still do as it pleases.

Hersh's law

Biochemical research is expanding, striving to occupy the entire space and time available for its completion and publication.

Finagle's first law

If the experiment succeeds, then something was done wrong.

Finagle's second law

Regardless of the expected result, there will always be those willing:

a) misinterpret it;

b) falsify it;

c) believe that he confirms their own favorite theory.

Finagle's third law

If some work is deadlocked, then whatever you do to improve the situation, things will only get worse.

Axiom Wingow

All Finagle's laws can be circumvented by mastering the simple art of acting thoughtlessly.

The rule of scrupulousness

When working on a solution to a problem, it's always helpful to know the answer ahead of time.

Young's Law

All great discoveries are made by mistake.

Consequence

The more money allocated to work, the longer it takes to make the right mistake.

Fett's Law of Laboratory Research

Never repeat a successful experiment.

Lunsford Rule of Scientific Activity

A simple explanation is always possible only after a difficult decision.

Parkinson's Law of Medical Research

The more successful the research is, the more grant you can get, and this, in turn, will make further research impossible.

The whole picture principle

Research scientists are so preoccupied with their efforts to achieve something in a narrow field that they are unable to get a complete picture of anything - including their own research.

Consequence

The leader of a research project should know as little as possible about the specific subject matter of the research he is leading.

Olbinack's algorithm

When plotting a function, the line thickness should be inversely proportional to the accuracy of the available data.

Lerman Technology Act

With enough time and money, any technical problem can be overcome.

Consequence

You will always run out of time or money.

The law of discovery

If you suddenly get a completely original idea, someone else has already thought about it a week earlier.

Malek's law

The simpler the idea, the more difficult it is to present it.

Dunlap's laws of physics

1. Fact is a solidified and crystallized opinion.

2. Under the influence of extremely high heat and pressure, facts may become weaker.

3. Truth is a loose concept.

Extended Epstein-Heisenberg principle

In the field of research and development, only two of the three essential parameters can be determined simultaneously. These parameters are the task at hand, time and financial resources.

1. If you know what the task is, and there is a time limit for its completion, then no one is even able to guess how much it will cost.

2. If time and financial resources are well defined, it is impossible to know how much of the research task can be accomplished.

3. If a clearly formulated goal of research work is set, as well as a certain amount of money, which, according to calculations, is necessary to complete the specified task, then it is impossible to predict whether it will be possible to achieve the set goal and when it will be done.

Addition

If someone is lucky and he knows how to accurately determine all three of these parameters, then his activity takes place outside the framework of the world of scientific research.

Dochez's Rule

In medicine, you do one experiment to convince yourself, and then ninety-nine more to convince others.

Freivald's law

Only a fool can reproduce the work of another fool.

Tenenbaum's law of reproducibility

The most interesting results are seen only once.

Hanji Law

The more trite your research, the more people will get to know and agree with it.

Consequence

The more relevant your research, the fewer people will understand it.

A brief guide to modern sciences

1. If something is green or wriggling, then it is biology.

2. If something stinks, then it is chemistry.

3. If nothing works, then it is physics.

Surf's add-on

4. If something is incomprehensible to the mind, then it is mathematics.

5. If something is devoid of any meaning, then it is either economics or psychology.

Medical supplement

6. If this is all of the above, then it is - medicine.

The principle of reliability

The difference between the laws of nature and Murphy's law is this: in the case of the laws of nature, you can count on all the troubles to happen exactly the same every time.

Bloch Supplement

Darwinists will do the same.

Mench's law

Nothing improves any innovation like a lack of control and management.

May's law on tomography

The correlation quality is inversely proportional to the density of the measurement points.

Von Braun's Creed

Scientific research is what I do when I don't know what I am doing.

Westheimer's discovery

A couple of months in the lab can often save a couple of hours in the library.

Morse's Law of Searching for Information on the Internet

Any search for medical information will lead to at least one pornographic site.

Bates law of scientific research

Scientific research is the process of walking around alleys to see if they are dead ends.

The law of laboratory work

Hot glass looks exactly the same as cold glass.

Basic rule for laboratory workers

When you don't understand what you are doing, do it very carefully.

Finagle's rule

It is very important and useful to work as part of a group. It always allows someone else to blame.

Lemma Land

If the experiment fails, question the experiment; if the experiment succeeds, question the theory.

Bersheder's law

Experiment and theory often show remarkable agreement with each other, especially if they were developed in the same laboratory.

Law of Scientific Research by Alain

The theory is confirmed as long as there are funds for it.


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