99 signs of women you shouldn't meet


All of you, probably, have ever wondered whether it is possible to define a woman with whom to have a relationship - a waste of time? And even a whole moral trauma. Now, on the basis of many years of life experience, as many as 99 signs of a woman with whom you should not get acquainted have been deduced. If curiosity or just common sense prompts you to familiarize yourself with this part of the objective reality given to us in sensations, we recommend that you be patient, since there are many signs and they are given in detail.

1. The lady made a lot of acquaintances through the questionnaires, and little by little she began to "move down the roof" (this, unfortunately, happens). In this case, she either thrashes too briskly with her tongue, or immediately "takes the bull by the horns." Such a second question will ask about the horoscope sign, and the third - about living conditions. I say it again: I was interested in those women who have not yet used ads. I had to strain the brain convolutions in order to learn how to quickly calculate those. First, they immediately started asking about "bad habits." It is enough even that this phrase was used in conversation. Secondly, this one will not be embarrassed at all, but will begin to briskly ask about everything - what, they say, you live, but what is the circle of your hobbies ... I sent all the ladies of this kind without remorse - in the end, there are a lot of them, and I am alone.

2. Overly choosy in men. Begins to meticulously ask about bad habits, about character traits, about everyday preferences, asks all sorts of provocative questions, for example: "And when you parted with women, who exactly was the initiator of the break - you or she?" This, among other things, means that she has either already drunk the bitter cup of dating through ads, or has a rich personal experience, that is, she is "second-hand". A relationship with such a person is guaranteed not to work out. Yes, actually, why start?

3. Financially anxious, cynical ladies. They are easy to recognize by a single word that will inevitably slip through their speech - "freeloader" (that is, a man who likes to sleep with women, but does not give them gifts). In addition, ladies of this type immediately begin to ask in the case: "What kind of car do you have?" In this case, I always replied that I have a "Jaguar" in the color of "British Raising", and not very new - '96 (here I always let a little sigh). But on the other hand, a complete set - a leather interior, a full automatic machine, an air conditioner, a computer, an ABS ... I can't change it in any way, I invest all my money in the construction of a cottage, and I'm used to it already. I’ll get acquainted with a good girl, and I’ll give it to her, and I’ll look after something newer for myself ”(here a prolonged enthusiastic sigh is usually heard in the receiver). But, remembering the advice of my friend, you should never accumulate negative emotions in yourself, I with the intelligence in my voice I continue: "Excuse me, I can't talk anymore. They should call me here on the announcement. "Thus, the lady subtly, without insults, is given to understand that she is nobody. And this, by the way, is true.

4. Loves the very institution of marriage, passionately dreams of getting married. Actually, absolutely all women (often even married) want to get married, especially those who vehemently deny this in words. In our case, she is eager to start a family so much that in fact, she absolutely does not care who to marry - "if only the person was good," that is, he loved her, the children, provided for the family ... Here the role of a man as a person is reduced to scratch. In other words, everything that makes a given man an individual is most often dismissed - only what "is needed for the family" is left.And for everything that distinguishes him from a certain "grayness", he will be sawed every day. It's unavoidable. But why the hell to spoil the life of this individual? Maybe look for a more suitable one? When they love, they love individuality. Well, you should try to find a lady who will love us, and not the institution of the family ... Some competent author even came up with an aphorism - "men get married because they fall in love; women fall in love because they want to get married." So the female desire to have a family in any case turns out to be the basis of her relationship to us, and there's nothing you can do about it. Women are what they are; we do not have others and never will ... Then what to do? At least find a woman to get along with. Any person has some kind of world that makes him different from others - like, he loves the Porsche, not the six hundredth, wine, not beer, loves to drive a bike in the evenings, sometimes he reads something clever ... It is logical for a girl to like this, and not something else. Then she will be "livable". Agree, if she hates worrying when he runs the risk of crashing somewhere in a ravine, and on his return fires an innocent lad with bad words, then, probably, it is better for her to look for another - more homely. So, I was interested in a long-term relationship; Willy-nilly, I was faced with the task of finding a girl who would sympathize with the whole complex of my own "problems" (partly he was listed above). I couldn’t agree to anything less. If there is no such one, then I firmly decided for myself in this case to be content with casual connections. And whoever did not hide, I am not to blame ...

5. Her income is more than 3 times higher than my own. Of course, love has no barriers, but if, for example, she is used to dine at the Pirosmani restaurant every weekend, then how, pray tell, will I dine there with her? I still won't be able to pay for both, for some reason I don't want to dine at her expense, and spending the weekend separately - what kind of novel is this? How would you like to spend your vacation? Go to the Canary Islands at her expense? And how will she eventually start looking at me then? It is unlikely that, out of love for me, she will give up her old habits, women, as a rule, do not like to abandon the habit of living widely, and in this case one of us must give up his habits. Either I - from a pathological dislike for making money, or it is for a high quality of life and consumption. And then, such a relationship is initially doomed. Besides, wealth corrupts in general. It also spoils the peasants (I did not know a single person who would not be spoiled by money and did not even hear about such), and women, with their general commercialism - and even more so. Why do I need spoiled and depraved?

6. She comes from a poor family. Mom is a nurse, dad is a school teacher in the Moscow region. The elder brother is disabled. They live on 1200 rubles a month. From them they buy medicines for a seriously ill grandmother; pay for the younger sister's music school ... In fact, during my "telephone epic" this item did not appear, and now you will find out why. The fact is that in the event of significant discrepancies between a man and a woman - this applies to anything: age, education, wealth, worldview - sooner or later there will be an imbalance in the relationship. And it will almost certainly lead to their gradual destruction. Poverty corrupts in the same way as wealth - but only with the opposite sign. All sorts of troubles, complexes arise ... Read Dostoevsky. He ate the dog on it. Smart men say that "you need to look in your own clearing." But, apparently, I was not a smart man. Yes, I met a very nice girl. She was beautiful, intelligent, non-mercantile, and most importantly, she really liked the type of men to which I belong. She could hardly make ends meet (she ate pasta with ketchup for months). Yes, we had a great romance.After all, it’s bliss to give some Finnish cream (I couldn’t afford the French ones) and see her eyes shining - this is a fortune for her. But only now the relationship then ended, and precisely because of this point (or rather, some of its consequences). That's why I inserted it here. If you cherish the hope that your romance will grow into something more, then keep all this in mind. Actually, you need to provide the novel with the opportunity to smoothly flow into a full-fledged family life, and if people fit together, then this usually happens. For some reason, the opposite outcome turns out to be rather painful. And by that time I knew it the hard way.

7. She is a manager or a business woman (even if not with high income). The bad news is that she will almost certainly transfer the team-like relationship to my own person. Can't help but transfer. Women are incredibly solid creatures. Yes, you know it without me.

8. Had a very rich sponsor, and for a long time. This means that she is corrupted not only materially, by money, but also morally.

9. She is greedy, or "frugal," which is actually the same thing. It is not always possible to find out right away. But you need to. Try to find out if she (or Virgo) is Capricorn - these are the most "thrifty" signs of the horoscope. However, if she asks from the very beginning how, they say, you feel about thrifty women, then this will definitely indicate that for this greed she (at least) has already been abandoned once. And three times unhappy is he who gets it! The fact is that greed is one of those vices that I absolutely cannot stand. In both women and men.

10. Limiters and other nonresident people wishing to register in Moscow. In this case, sooner or later the corresponding topic will slip through their conversation. And for a woman in general, what hurts about, she says about that - you just need not to interfere with them to speak and be able to maintain a conversation. Let her talk and she will tell you everything. Even what he does not want ... Chekhov wrote that if you want to take possession of a woman, you will learn to listen to her complaints. Women are not accustomed to the fact that men listen to them ... In fact, it is generally known that the most interesting girls live in the provinces. But, unfortunately, it is not possible to find out whether she loves this particular dude, or his Moscow residence / well-being / coolness, for the first few years - women are so cunningly arranged that if she assured herself of something, then she will be accordingly behave - and it almost always looks very, very convincing. And she will assure herself that she infinitely loves you for your extraordinary virtues. Of course, the truth may be revealed, but, alas, it will be too late. My childhood friend, Volodya Trofimov, used to say with his characteristic frankness: "Why did she come to Moscow? Where she was born, men, or what, no? So, it's not a man, and she needs not you, but your registration . Ah, does she love you? You just think so because you think that you are better than others. You shouldn't have thought so - and you would not have burned yourself. " I myself managed to marry a classmate from Ryazan. For some reason, I used to think that a good education changes a woman's essence. Subsequently, it turned out that he did not change ...

11. A kind of "dinamschitsy" who love to sit in a restaurant at your expense. They will just have lunch, and then they will sincerely thank you. You won't see them again. It is easy to recognize - they will immediately ask you which bar you prefer, or even immediately offer to have lunch or dinner together, while adding special, mesmerizing men's heart notes to your voice (they say, after dinner you will taste this ...). Most likely, the majority of men are easily "led" to this. Either the boys act even worse than such women, namely, they try to negotiate in advance the moment of sex as a payback for the treat.Okay, if it concerns a fool who falls under this item - but what if a decent and worthy girl comes across? How can you then neutralize the inevitable feeling that she is being turned into a prostitute? It follows, by the way, that men who behave in this way are forced to constantly revolve in a circle of vulgar women who give themselves up for a treat, and then throw out their indignation: they say they are all whores, everyone without exception ... No, brother, you are naughty! It’s only you come across these ... Our "customers" are not able to open this vicious circle, the vicious model of relations once chosen will not allow ... It was easier for me with all this, since I was focused on a more or less long romance. I just suggested taking a walk in the (crowded) evening streets. Interesting girls immediately agreed, the rest were sent nafig.

12. She is a "collector". There are such people too. She only needs a man to sleep with him once. And the man is not every, but in some way different from others - like, his figure is cool, or the extraordinary dimensions of his genitals (I honestly confess that all this does not apply to me). Or his announcement is too different from others - as it was in my case. Such people speak in a low voice with special (in their female opinion) "sexual" intonations; their goals, as a rule, do not hide. Others admit so honestly - so, they say, I want to add you to my collection ... As I understand it, this is all done in order to show off to friends - well, and to prove to herself that she still arouses sexual interest. In general, I was a little annoyed that I was treated like a collectible. With a disgusting feeling that they just wanted to use me, I could not put up with it - and therefore frankly sent those. By the way, they say that very normal and decent women often experience something like this from our brother ...

13. She is married, but "unhappy in marriage." Looking for someone else - like for a vacation. This is inconvenient, since you cannot start a real romance with such one. She will always rush home after 7 pm. And in general - what kind of relationship is this? Will I be used as an outlet? And what is usually released through the vent? All sorts of miasms ...

14. She is a single mother. In many cases, this fact is carefully hidden. Ladies in general usually hope to captivate the applicant with their brilliant merits, believing in their naivety that they will brighten up this unfortunate fact. This, however, did not happen in my case. The lady I met was indeed both beautiful and smart - but, alas, I can't help myself - I hate and do not forgive smart-ass. By the way, she turned out to have a wonderful husband who loves her child very much, earns money, takes care of the family ... But, you see, she is very bored with him ... I felt like shit, which substitutes her own bro ... Curious that she called me later and even wrote by e-mail. That's why I don't like single mothers the most: they are second-hand. When a woman has a child, she loves him first. Then he himself, as "a person close to the emperor." Then ... then my mother. And only then, if only I'm lucky ... I really need to listen to her enthusiastic stories about how her child learned to draw. What - I have mine, or what, no?

15. Communicates in a deliberately humiliating tone that is felt literally immediately. This means that she had a lot of problems - in life, with men, with health. And then everything will get even worse, believe me.

16. Communicates with a touch of at least a slight irony in his voice. Most likely a divorce. A lot of shit that will inevitably come up. The point of this list is also this: there are no small things. Any little thing will sooner or later show itself - and how! You won't be glad yourself ...

17. After the first conversation, she does not give her home phone number, but vaguely promises to call back.This means one of two things: either she is weak in character, and does not like to take risks, or depends on some other external factors (oppressive parents, husband, external deformity, and so on). Anyway, she has something to hide. Or she herself does not know why she called. Usually never calls back.

18. He gives not his phone number, but a friend (parents), or a worker. Like, through them we will keep in touch. Same.

19. She makes an appointment in a place known to be convenient only for her (next to her job, university, library, and so on). That girl who in my circle is called "normal" always seeks to make an appointment in a neutral, convenient place for both. For example, if she lives in Medvedkovo, and you live in the Southwest, then this will be the center of Moscow. That is, it seems to take into account the interests of another person. Otherwise, expect some nasty stuff. For example, she has a bunch of men, or has been dating for a long time, or falls under one of the points listed above, or something else (this is all checked). I must say that if we embark on this unsteady and difficult path - acquaintance through advertisements - then we need to be ready for any nasty things. Experience is late, that women have no number for them. Even this list is not enough ...

20. After the first conversation, he does not agree to a meeting even after a few days. This meeting is not meant in the context of communication. Usually says in a lazy voice: "Well, you are calling." Pulls rubber in every possible way. This is bad, since a normal girl is fearful as curious, and she can't wait to look at a new acquaintance. This means that the current one, again, has something to hide - a bad appearance, a husband, children, age and so on. And maybe, what terrible character traits and complexes, because of which she has already been thrown more than once. So now she is afraid to take at least some steps ... But why is she so necessary, notorious? Is it hard to find normal?

21. Generally pulls with a real meeting. This means that she is not going to get acquainted at all - and so, she spends time out of curiosity. Like, her husband is not at home, she is bored, so she started ringing ads. In other words, she decided to use you as a convenient and free entertainment. Especially if you are good at keeping up a conversation, have a sense of humor ... It's interesting that subjectively she doesn't give herself an account of this, because she thinks that she is kind of giving you her attention. Also a gift to me ... But there may be another reason for her slowness. She meets with many men at once, and she simply "put you in the queue for viewing". By itself, this role is already humiliating, but, again, this is not the main thing. The fact is that a woman who meets several at the same time is forever spoiled, try to understand this. Yes, their desire is by all means, at any cost, to acquire an unusually wretched family. However, he also has a downside, positive side: a normal woman still strives to maintain relations with only one chosen one, and this should be welcomed in every possible way. So what does her soul otherwise represent? Again - this vulgar "conveyor" ...

22. After the first conversation and even during it, he offers to meet immediately, after 1-2 hours, in any place convenient for you. I'm even ready to come to your home. This is also suspicious. Why is she so hung around her neck? Want to quickly solve your problems? A woman shouldn't offer to meet herself at all - it's unfeminine. It is feminine to wait for a man to propose. Otherwise, she also has some troubles. In the days of my youth, the song was in vogue: "If a beauty on x ... rushes, be careful, gonorrhea is possible" - to a well-known motive, by the way (J. Bizet) ...

23. At the very first conversation, he suggests: "Come on, meet, and sit somewhere" (including at her house). This doesn't suit me personally. Not the female type. Just not the one.

24. Hides his age. He only mentions that "I am older than you."This in itself is already bad - my last romance with a peer ended in a terrible breakup. Alas! Women over 23 know too well the value of money ... And what should they, the poor, believe in this vale of tears and sorrow? Human decency? Eternal love? Agree, to believe in money is somehow more reliable. But for some reason personally it did not suit me. It’s better if she’s not so beautiful, but with a normal soul ...

25. In general, he is terribly secretive, and this is immediately felt. Hides the most innocent things: horoscope sign, height, profession (except, of course, age and weight) ... A normal woman is always sincere, and she responds to sincere treatment with sincerity. Women have a nose for such things. In most cases, a woman, as it were, reflects the type of relationship that is imposed on her, and it should be recognized that in this sense a woman is a perfect charm. Unless, of course, she's not pathological shit, as in this case. So this one is abnormal. She has complexes there, or something else ...

26. On the contrary, immediately, directly, he begins to cut the "truth-womb", and he does it with some kind of inner challenge, almost with impudence: "Yes, I am already 27. Yes, height 160, and weight 58. Well, what?" Complexes. You will see: her next phrase will be: "Does this say anything about me as a person?" Send it nafig - otherwise you will be exhausted later.

27. Too much, excitedly, with rapture, talks about himself and practically does not ask anything. This is also bad. Normal communication is a two-way road. Having started talking a lot about herself and almost getting carried away, a normal woman almost always suddenly stops (this is how reflection usually works for them), and thinks to herself (or even out loud, which is even better): “Oh, what am I all about myself? now, probably, you will think ... "And then he will also ask something - at least for decency (your will, and I personally think that in the sense of this sincere reflection, women are perfect darlings. This is very, very touching). In our case, she may turn out to be a narcissistic egoist, who considers you a worm. Or, even worse, it can try to hide something behind the false talkativeness. She may think that men like such talkers, that is, she has perverted ideas about men. Or maybe she likes perverts? Or something else. In a word, she's crazy. And a woman should be normal. Not to be confused with the word "dullness". But this is my own list, please consider.

28. A lot of "yaks". He constantly says: "Yes, I could ...", "Yes, I have ...", "Yes, if I only wanted to ...". According to Chekhov, cocottes say so. Fuck knows what happened to her. Also some kind of disgusting. True, I have not personally tested it (unlike most other points).

29. Can't communicate. Not in the sense that he cannot connect two words. Here we are talking about something else. The fact that she does not know how to listen to another person, how to control the natural, full-fledged course of a conversation. When people fit together, one, as a rule, starts, and the other grasps the thought "on the fly" and continues it. A special feeling of lightness arises - and, alas, it occurs very rarely. And here is something else. Here is the exact quote from the originator of this list: "Asks too many questions, the flow of which begins to dominate the free flow and development of the conversation." Actually, it's not about questions. She can talk about something else. All this means that something is wrong with her. Some problems, or maybe complexes again ... Here is one of the ways in which you can calculate a woman with a bad temper (I always proceed from the classical definition that a woman with a bad temper is a woman). In communication, she will constantly oppose you to herself. That is, you tell her that, for example, you love skiing. A normal woman will immediately say: "Oh, how great! Lucky you! This is probably so cool!" - or something like that.Moreover, he will add sadly: "But I have never skated" - which will give a normal man the opportunity to immediately, pouting with pride, inform her that he has a second pair of skis, and next to his house there is a wonderful slide ... And now let us imagine what the soul of a woman should be like, which reacts in a completely different way, and to a completely ordinary fact. To the story about skiing, she replies: "Fu, how disgusting! You will fall, break your legs, and the nasty cold snow will fall into your bosom!" Obviously, by doing so, she does not listen to the interlocutor, but asserts herself. She does not hear the other person at all, completely occupied with herself and her problems. But it follows from this that she has some serious problems with the perception of herself, the world around her and men in particular. Perhaps she is pissed at the whole world - like, "I'm so good, and no one loves me." And here she with inhuman stubbornness wants to make the whole world fall in love with her - and you just fell under the arm ... Or there are some other secret complexes in her, which will inevitably appear later. And to find them as early as possible is our task. So: a girl with a normal psyche and not a perverse character will react positively to a story about the hobbies of a guy who is getting to know her; in the case of an idiotic character, she will criticize him for everything in a row, opposing him with her own bright image. It is enough to perk up and look for frequently encountered phrases like: "I don't like that", "That's strange! But I ...", "I would never ..." - or something like that, to learn how to diagnose such a lady. My friend used to say: "A woman is already a diagnosis." This criterion looks a little sophisticated, but it is the most accurate and the best. Verified many times.

30. Provides unreasonable internal resistance during a conversation. This is also a kind of subtlety, but still I will try to explain. A woman is a being guided, at least at the beginning of the development of relations. Moved not by consciousness, but by intuition, she usually trusts a man, and if he tells her something new, she kind of verifies it with her inner feelings - which in this case seem to tell her "yes" or "no" , "true" or "false". This comparison occurs almost instantly, and the result of her interlocutor receives in the form of an emotional reaction - like she likes one thing, the other does not ... This immediately manifests itself in the female intonations of speech, in the facial expression ... Occasionally there are women who really go crazy, when a man says out loud what they "always felt". The real thrill from communicating with a good, unmistakable something (which is what this list is intended to filter out) a woman also lies in the fact that she kind of succumbs to male pressure and, as they say, is "led." This is expressed in the way she listens to him. Here is an example of how a woman can listen to a man: "Now, when he was telling all this to Natasha, he experienced that rare pleasure that women give when listening to a man - not smart women who, while listening, try or remember what they are told, in order to enrich your mind and, on occasion, retell the same or adapt what is being told to your own and communicate as soon as possible your clever speeches developed in your small, mental economy; and the pleasure that real women, gifted with the ability to absorb and absorb into themselves, give all the best that is only in the manifestations of a man. ”Natasha, without knowing it, was all the attention: she did not miss a word, not a hesitation in her voice, not a look, not a muscle flinch, not a gesture of Pierre. and directly brought it into her open heart, guessing the secret meaning of Pierre's spiritual work. " So - this Natasha undoubtedly knew how to listen, why L. Tolstoy calls her "real" (in such cases I use the word "normal"), but the mentioned "smart" woman (emphasized, by the way, by Tolstoy himself) - no. Something is bothering her.For example, if a woman really loves someone, then she listens to him as Natasha, and she listens to everyone else as "smart". That is, the words from her now seem to "fly off". And this is immediately felt - but, of course, if the interlocutor is tuned in to good communication and understanding of her. Or maybe she loves her dad too much? Or, even worse, herself ... Well, you need to love yourself in moderation too, and women, as a rule, are unfamiliar with this concept. Either she has some other serious, most often insurmountable, problems ... One way or another, you need to look for something else. For example, of the type described by Natasha (an excerpt is taken from the novel "War and Peace"). If you wish, it is quite possible to find ... You will now say that fig. Have you tried? You were definitely looking for Natasha, and not a spectacular tall blonde with a huge bust?

31. Something "not right" is immediately felt in her communication. she does not perceive reasoning as a whole, no matter how she knows how to catch the simplest thought, and does not support the conversation, but snatches out individual words or sentences and begins to confusely talk about them. In fact, she is mentally ill. This is one of the costs of getting to know each other by phone - all sorts of patients also call. It so happens that she then calls every day, does not remember your name, reacts normally if you introduce yourself differently (since the entire supply of funds to ward off such a person from your number is completely exhausted). I cannot call her a "fool"; laughing at sick people is still a sin. To be honest, I don’t remember how I got rid of it. It seems he killed, but buried in the park. However, no, I don't remember ...

32. At the beginning of the conversation, she immediately confesses that I am only one of the "candidates" for her, that in general she meets with many, but has not yet chosen anyone. First of all, it does not fit because it is cynical. Besides, there is something extremely humiliating in the very fact that I am being compared to others. Actually, such a comparison is always carried out. But in this case it was especially vulgar. Yes, she is too picky about everything - I still won't suit her. Then, there is no guarantee that even having chosen me, she will stop in her search - this latter is generally a thing so fascinating that even having found someone she should, she can only stop with a significant volitional effort (checked on myself). It is unlikely that a woman has so much will. They generally like to compare. Pay attention when a happy couple is walking towards you - which expresses her gaze directed at you. After all, with the naked eye it is clear that she is comparing. It is curious that she never admits this to herself - such are women! In this case, the caller is focused on an ideal that is unattainable for us all, mere mortals ... In passing, I note that women who meet on the Internet are almost always inherent in something similar. Choice is always corrupting. Keep this in mind, gentlemen! I would rather vegetate alone than be in the humiliating position of being so chosen. Or she does all the same, but does not openly admit it. Like "no, I only called you one." Finding out the truth is not difficult. She does not remember what they talked about last time, suddenly stumbles among the phrase (so she realized that she was referring to the conversation that we did not have), the phone that was silent in the evenings, evaded answering where she was at that time ... And in general, in communication with her, there is some kind of insincerity. Something in all this is opaque, some kind of fog was allowed here ... Everything is the same as in the previous case, but it also lies to everything.

33. She now has someone, but the relationship "has almost died out", they already "almost" do not meet, and so on. A normal girl does otherwise. She carefully hides the fact that she has someone, meets with another, and quietly abandons the first. By doing this, she relieves her new gentleman of worries like "what if my predecessor was somehow better than me?" Well, all that jazz. I have always been interested in tactful, understanding women.And you? In addition, in this case, a situation is possible when a lady in your company will receive a phone call, will say something like “Oh, are you angry with me?” In front of you, and then flies away, leaving you with a whole host various humanitarian experiences. And try not to let her go if you are applying for the title of a well-mannered person! But if in the first conversation she says that she has no one, you will have the moral right not to let her go anywhere.

34. Immediately, even in the first conversation, he begins to mention past novels, or generally likes to talk about them at length, and with a tinge of ecstasy in his voice. It seems that she does not understand what decency is ... Still, most women prefer to keep silent about their adventures. And by the way, they are right.

35. She is terribly depressed about parting with her "great love". Her heart is broken - and sometimes it really is (although some ladies make up such stories to give themselves weight). There are, of course, clever people who, sacrificing themselves, their pride, mental strength and time, perform a kind of nursing function around her. However, their situation is actually very deplorable. The lady is healed of her heartache, but the persona of the wise guy is forever associated with her with a period of serious illness. The guy will never be taken seriously. People, beware of such situations! Do people often marry nurses? This point was compiled by me on the basis of some publications in the magazine "Cosmopolitan", where they directly advise a woman "for the period of healing" to start some "intermediate version", throw out all the emotional negativity on him, and then ruthlessly throw it away. Do you like this role? Not to mention the fact that it is not very interesting to communicate with a person constantly returning to the same topic - "How could this scoundrel ?!"

36. Is divorced (and living together for several months does not count here). This is a very successful marriage. But now she was despicably abandoned and all the time that has passed since the divorce she was subjected to massive shelling by her friends, who day and night assured her that "all men are like that." Everything means all of us. They will initially look at you and me with suspicion - they say, will you not turn out to be exactly the same? And so, the poor chosen one will have to grudgingly overcome all of her complexes, while proving to her that "he is different", that is, not a camel. And the man finds himself here in a somewhat strange situation, when he needs one hundred percent to share the anger and hatred of his girlfriend about her "ex." The horror here is that, in fact, it may not be so bad at all. But you may have to contact him ... Let's think together what a pitiful impression the new "divorcee" makes when he is forced (as if in the name of relations with her) to constantly assent to her on this topic. He cannot make up his own firm man's opinion without risking losing the love of his current passion. And at the same time, opinions on all other issues. Outwardly, the man, without his fault, now looks like a typical henpecked. In my life there are real examples of this, namely - the new husband of my "ex". Yes, and I myself, immediately after the army, fell in love with a woman whose husband, busy with science, just rarely appeared with her. And I constantly assented to her on this topic. As now I recall his voice in the receiver: "You just don't understand anything now. You don't understand what connects us with her. I put my whole soul into her, I made her ... You will understand everything later." And now, many, many years have passed, and I understood everything - and even now I'm ready to apologize to him ... By the way, she cheated on me in the first month of marriage. And now, thinking about all this, I thought: why? Why all these problems? Is it possible that in Russia there are no absolutely good and free girls who do not need to prove anything and who will look at me not through the prism of their negative experience, but simply? Think about it yourself.

37.Lives with her mother, who has been divorced for a long time. A loving mother spent all her time and energy on her own daughter, sacrificed her own happiness ... And the daughter, who in words dreams of an independent life, at an unconscious level is not at all going to leave this mother alone in her old age. This means that your attempts to take your daughter away from her home (at least for the night) will by no means lead to your own house, but to the fact that your daughter will begin (without admitting to herself) to feel you as a person who wants her mommy evil (loneliness in old age, and all that). The joke here is that she herself will not even guess about this cunning twist, for women everything goes on the level of feelings, that is, on an unconscious level. So Turgenev writes: "That is most powerful in us, that remains in us a half-suspected truth." Gradually, you will become an object for the girl to channel these fears, expressed in the form of unreasonable aggression. And outwardly, everything will look like the girl will begin to explode with anger over any trifles. Both of you will most likely never be able to guess why. What is to blame is not hatred for you, but love for mommy, which so cunningly transformed into an episodic dislike for you. But that's not all. I met an interesting and (very) pretty girl from an incomplete family. And then, at the second meeting, she confessed to me that all the time of our conversations her mother was sitting next to her on the couch and taught her how to answer, demanded to ask all sorts of questions there ... And her daughter obeyed, she was not even indignant! Of course, there was no third meeting ... My weak mental strength can be enough for one woman. But also get involved with her mom! It is not difficult to calculate such a girl fixated on her mother by her catchphrase "I have no secrets from my mother." Occasionally there are variations: "My mother and I, as best friends, share everything with each other"; "I never lie to my mother." Women generally adore dressing up their mental problems in beautiful and compelling formulations, and woe to anyone who takes them at face value! I would like to note that the listed symptoms are sometimes also found in friendly, good families, where everyone feels like a "one team". Alas! A beautiful family also has its downside - a psychological "umbilical cord" that connects a lady with such a family, it can be very difficult to break, and often almost impossible. The psychological dependence of your "carrot" on its "ancestors" can be truly boundless. Up to the point that they will call up many times a day and discuss all the problems. Needless to say, in this situation, any pepper will feel, to put it mildly, redundant? In any case, you need to be prepared for the fact that the whole family will discuss his person; he will be constantly told what his dad, aunt, grandmother, grandfather, older brother, younger sister thinks of him ... In my second year at Univer, I was as afraid as in love with one girl; she seemed ideal to me. Once we sat at her house and discussed some world problem; on my lap several huge tomes lay open at once (it seems, the so-called "Blue Horse" - an encyclopedia of philosophy in 5 volumes). Suddenly her mom came in and turned to me. I began to make a timid attempt to get up, but I could not. The next day, my beloved told how my indecent behavior was discussed at the family council; Mom tirelessly sneered at my ignorance. Along the way, it turned out that my daughter did not say a word in my defense ... Y-yes ... So, about the relatives: and also - they can all call you. And to ask where their daughter is, if she does not return for a long time from the cinema, where she rode off in the evening "like with a friend." Note that the last variant of the family is still preferable to the others. Because if you act skillfully, then it is possible to break it - this umbilical cord. And this should be done at the very beginning of communication.To talk about human relationships, about feelings ... It is enough to bend the long and half-witted argument that "smart girls know that real feelings deepen if they do not tell anyone about them" (she will immediately imagine herself as a smart girl), cite a quote from Tyutcheva "spoken thoughts are a lie" (she will immediately begin to consider you an erudite person). However, it is enough just to mention Tyutchev - the acquaintance of a peasant with poetry always makes the most favorable impression on them, although apart from Tsvetaeva they have not read anything like that since the age of 16 - you can check and see for yourself. Then you can refer to Pushkin's Tatyana ... The most important thing is not to say the phrase “I don’t want”, because you will immediately be imagined as a maniac who wants to quietly dismember an innocent maiden in a nearby forest park - and the more decent the girl is, the higher the likelihood of such fantasies. And decent girls are all the same ... And I am convinced that this is even good.

38. Hates his mother, or even both parents. At the same time, "for a set" (for women, everything goes in one set), he also hates everything that is usually correlated with the traditionally female sphere of activity - housework, cooking, kitchen ... He also hates children (apparently at the same time). Either she has low self-esteem and the darkness of all sorts of troubles and complexes and you risk getting lost in this darkness, or she is lying (so that you do not suspect that she is going to marry you: this is possibly even worse). I did get to the first option. On one of her first visits, he began to cook for her "spaghetti boulonnaise" (she was always hungry), and asked to stir in a saucepan while I was talking on the phone. She then nailed me for more than two weeks (and this is not an exaggeration); to overcome this character trait, I had to spend a lot of mental, and all other forces. Yes, I did overcome it. And still we parted over time ...

39. The same thing, but she also ran away from home; six months living with friends and girlfriends. Most likely, she just got tired of them, she has nowhere to go and she wants to live with you. See that it does not settle in nature.

40. Her father is actually an outstanding personality (a high-ranking government official, a talented writer, a famous businessman, a movie star, a famous writer, scientist, artist, and so on). It is very easy to find out, you don't even need to ask any questions. The Pope's name will be pronounced only occasionally and with an enthusiastic aspiration; sometimes you can still be corrected in a conversation: "But how? After all, my dad says ..." - and all this in such a tone, as if we are talking about the Holy Scriptures. My beloved (the one who is in her second year; she was still in the first and third years) did not even let me look at the books in the "holy holy" - the office of her father, in her opinion a talented poet (not a single reference to him, however, was possible found on the web). I was "loaded" with stories about his extraordinary mind, about belonging to a noble family. This spring, I was buying new attachments for my mountain bike. I also wandered into the Sokolniki department store, where the American Nimbus water purification system was on sale; I was thinking about putting it in the country. An elderly, poorly dressed couple nearby for some reason attracted my attention ... Or rather, in the woman's manners, I immediately felt something painfully familiar. Somewhere I had already seen all this, but I could not remember where. Suddenly she turned to her husband by name - and then it hit me like a thunderbolt. That was the name of Her father! And these were exactly the manners of my university sweetheart, manners that time had already erased almost from memory. And exactly the same slightly wrong nose, how I loved it then! I turned the English instructions in my hands, and I myself looked and looked at them out of the corner of my eye, almost without stopping, and long-dead feelings bubbled up in me ... I remembered that encyclopedia too ... "Mom all evening made fun of your bad manners and spoke that it's no good. "Former high-ranking officials considered a cheap stainless steel spoon for a long time, deliberating whether to buy or not to buy ... The head of the family was dressed in some kind of funny black top hat with a lurid yellow plastic visor; his wife was wearing old worn-out sneakers ... Sic transit gloria mundi! So: all this is bad not only because the daughter is guaranteed to have an overestimated self-esteem, and hence a terrible character. But also because the "hand seeker" will always feel that next to this dad he is nobody. A woman generally tends to dominate a man in order to reduce his flight to a goal that is simple for her and understandable - a trivial service of procreation (that is, her own person). And comparing her daddy with her boyfriend, for some reason, is also biologically peculiar to her. The comparison will never be in his favor now. And they will never fully respect him either. Thus, a woman acquires an additional trump card for her dominance. I will also note that if a woman with normal self-esteem always (more often unconsciously) strives to dominate both in relationships and in marriage, then in the case of underestimated or overestimated self-esteem, this dominance becomes the main means of self-affirmation. Actually, women have no other ways of self-affirmation. Why then? On the other hand, when I think about it, what fool did I exchange my love for ...

41. She studies in an openly technical university - MEPhI, MIEM, MIREA ... This almost certainly means that she is a freak. Or she "not all at home." So, in a normal way, all women have a classic humanitarian consciousness. Otherwise ... Besides, I am a typical, downright complete humanist. What is it: I am a humanitarian, and she is a techie? Well, pray tell, can you get out of such an alliance?

42. After 20 years, remains innocent. The situation here is twofold. Option one. Her parents raised her in exceptional severity, she expects a serious attitude towards herself, but, on the other hand, she can respond in the same way, and then this is truly a gift of fate. In my opinion, which cannot be called modest, it is innocence that most of all provokes an elevated attitude towards oneself. It is somehow psychologically easier to take care of a girl, give her flowers, walk in the park - if you know that she has not yet been in the wrong hands. The second, much more common option. She is a fool with a truly terrifying character that no one simply desired. Or maybe such goats were molested that it is better to go to a monastery than to be with them. However, now she needs to save face, carefully disguising her character. The method of disguise is chosen, like everything feminine in general, the most sophisticated. For example, the ad states: "I am waiting for the prince to give him the dearest. I took care of myself for him. However, everything will happen only after the legal wedding. I give guarantees, but I also wait for guarantees." All this is sewn with white threads, and in reality it means: I change my innocence for a stamp in my passport, residence permit, apartment, wallet, his freedom and what else women usually demand ... But apart from innocence I guarantee nothing else - for example, a good, livable character, understanding, loyalty, pure soul, and so on. That is, the men are essentially offered a pig in a poke. Innocence is undoubtedly a great value (primarily in a spiritual sense), but it really is not worth such sacrifices. By the way - John Chrysostom wrote that innocent girls are most easily amenable to trainers ... sorry, education. In fact, a girl after 18-19 years old will be frankly seized by her friends: "For whom are you taking care of yourself?", "You need to enjoy life", "youth will pass quickly", and I don't know what else they usually "load" with there. ... Often, deep down, they are simply jealous - they themselves must have lost their innocence through drunkenness, with casual acquaintances ... (the girls themselves told me about such envy). However, if you believe that the last virgin was run over in 1913 by a tram, then I dare to assure you that you are mistaken.In Russia there are a lot of really good and innocent girls - even older than 20. Often, under the influence of primitive ideology, they are ashamed to admit this fact - like, no one needs them, poor things. They do not go to bars, they do not differ in their cheeky manners ... Sometimes they are generally called "gray mice", and they are called mainly by those who broadcast this vulgar ideology in society: "if she does not want to give herself up right away, then she is a pervert." In reality, everything is exactly the opposite. And these "gray mice" are given the value that you absolutely do not understand at the age of poor self-affirmation, and more and more you begin to appreciate the years after 35 - the ability to be modest. And therefore they seem to be out of sight. And a phone ad is the perfect way to find one. In the conversation, you can immediately feel ...

43. Pathologically afraid of losing her innocence (this is provided that she is over 20 years old). Raises this topic in the very first conversation. Most likely, she has an ambivalent attitude to the problem: she wants and does not want to lose at the same time (women have an ambivalent attitude towards everything, and, first of all, towards men). Her innocence for her is almost certainly the guarantor of a successful personal life in the future. But a happy family can be created without being innocent. Most often, this is how it happens ... This means that she has a very low self-esteem. Or even worse: purely neurotic addiction to her virginity; this latter became for her what is called a "fixation point". That is, a kind of spiritual support, something like faith (or feeling good, which is the same in the female case). Then the following happens. All this neurotic complex after the loss of innocence will have to be transferred to something else - not to waste the good ?! She needs to believe in something, if there is no innocence now. It is guaranteed that the transfer will go to the bastard who robbed her of her innocence. Now she will be (just as panicky) afraid of losing him. One neurotic entity will inevitably be replaced by another. Drive nature through the door ... Sic transit gloria ... In short, our lady will start to be terribly jealous of him - even to a lamppost (excessive jealousy is generally ugly; women are simply disgusting). So, in general, low self-esteem is most often manifested, even in such souls as men. In the end, they will still part, but at the same time, the dude will most likely spit in his soul (experience shows that women do not know how to part differently) ... And in general, a girl needs to believe in something else. In love, for example. "A girl can lose her innocence in the struggle for love, or she can lose love in the struggle for innocence."

44. Lost her innocence at the age of 14; since then has led a very turbulent life. Second-hand. Let people of her circle get to know her.

45. Has more than 2 (two) animals at home. Cockroaches, ants, mice, and moths don't count. It's a bit difficult to explain here. First, it means that she really needs to take care of someone. But one beast would be enough. In extreme cases, two. In fact, nothing happens by chance, and if she dragged the third kitten from the street (they say, he froze there), then this does not change the essence of the matter at all - she brought him. Others somehow passed by. This means that her need to care is hypertrophied. And from this it follows (based on that same fucking psychoanalysis) that she herself received less attention from her parents. That is, her psyche was formed somehow wrong. You say: what a trifle, you can neglect. Of course. But only not in the case when forty girls call you a day. Oh yes, I almost forgot: I hate dogs at home, even in a single quantity ... But more on that below.

46. ​​She is too well-read (an important note of my friend: she is much more well-read than her work or study requires). There is no need to check this at all, since women who have received an education are so intoxicated with their intellectual world that they simply cannot hide it.A typical illustration of the "rags to riches" saying. They look down on mere mortals exclusively, even to the point of losing decency. Believe me, a man who spent several years among girls, who could not overcome this temptation. Only one and overcame - a very nice girl, my classmate, from Kyrgyzstan (I called her Dzhambulka). And why, asshole, then didn’t I have an affair with her? And why did he marry a fool? It is remarkable that men almost do not have this, and this is because we are generally given to be generous. Advances in science make a man a personality. A woman is already initially a person (if only she is) and without any science. If she is a fool, then no science will save her ... A characteristic feature of educated women is that for some reason they believe that their erudition and intellect will inevitably attract men to them. Or, in other words, these properties are gradually beginning to supplant purely feminine ones - tact, delicacy, the ability to understand ... That same beloved of mine, from the second year, having just learned a third foreign language (namely French), used to communicate in it in my presence with his "outstanding" daddy - knowing in advance that I'm almost no boom-boom in French. It was absolutely bad form; it is significant that both were not aware of this. So that's it. A high education of a woman means that you will be expected to have the highest level - and, if possible, even higher than hers. It is best to calculate such ladies from the very beginning and simply avoid until they then spit in your soul. By the way, Pushkin also writes: "Be stupid, but good." Bazarov at Turgenev says: "I noticed that among women think only freaks." So she's probably dumb. Although not necessary. So, if in her conversation you hear at least one of such names as Jacques Derrida, Umberto Eco, Gabrielle Marcel, Merleau-Ponty, Jean Baudrillard, Gadamer, Ortega y Gasset, Henri Bergson, Carl Jung, Kierkegaard, and especially - note! - Boris Vian (absolutely all educated girls are captured by him), then boldly get out: nothing will shine for you. Everything abstract in women is ultimately neurotic (Dzhambulka, who now graduated from the Sorbonne, does not count). You will be tortured for a long time and tediously before being sent to hell anyway. However, remember: if in her conversation the names of Erich Fromm, Sigmund Freud and, especially, Julius Evola slip through, and many psychoanalytic terms do not follow, then all is not lost. Education is education, and this one almost certainly wants a strong male embrace. There are also other "sets". A set of names such as Dostoevsky, Tolstoy, Tyutchev, Fet, Chekhov, sometimes Berdyaev is more or less acceptable. You can still find a common language with these, intellectually they have not torn off our soil. Although, of course, there will be problems. For information: the authors of the very first "set" do not represent much value, and if a spark of regret suddenly slipped in your soul - how, they say, I did not read them, and I will die as an ignoramus - then feel free to relax. There is nothing sensible there. It's just that the West from immeasurable wealth fell into all sorts of perversions, including intellectual ones. By the way, I have come across such ladies several times. Nice to remember, damn it! In this case, he acted almost as in the case of the "jaguar", only the other way around: he talked in a simple way, more and more about people, about life, everything is simple, everything with humor ... And then, when in one case she finally got drunk with her superiority and began to scatter phrases in Latin, then suddenly began to answer her in it. And then - he scolded her beloved Olivier Messiaen and Sartre (especially "L'etre et le neant" of the latter - now, I forgot to insert it into the first list), and all this is conceptual, with examples and quotes ... And then, when she already all trembled with delight - uttered my cherished phrase: "Excuse me, but I can't speak anymore. They should call me here on the announcement ..." Even now it's nice to remember how it was trampled ...That she read Sartre - she is a fool, and not those who did not deserve to read it, remember this. The work mentioned proves that our existence is completely absurd - both life and death ... Also a great idea for me! And then why the hell was this lady wasting time trying to get over this nonsense? To show off? It would be better if I learned how to make salads ... Moreover. Excessive reading among women, as a rule, is a compensation for any hidden shortcomings - at least low self-esteem, or maybe even worse. A normal girl, remember this, gentlemen! Will read romance novels and watch love melodramas. And this is not because she is a round and disgusting fool, pathologically incapable of perceiving deep ideas, as other, not very distant people believe. She just lives in her normal system of values ​​associated with the world of emotions and human relationships. If she is well now, and she has a good man, then this stupid reading additionally warms up her feeling of happiness. And in general, her mood improves (which every normal man understands perfectly well and that it is actually very beneficial for him). If she disappears from loneliness, then all this creep instills in her confidence that she, too, will be fine with time ... And this, in turn, saves her from extreme anger towards the entire human race (as a rule, women are different and does not occur). In short, in any case, such reading (or serials) provide her with a good vitality and a positive attitude towards the world. That is why the ladies are so fond of films with a happy ending, and when tender kisses are shown in the finale, they stop and stare just like hypnotized, like a rabbit under the gaze of a boa constrictor. It is they who are gaining positive emotions, and there is no need to blame them for that. And this goes to the Philharmonic not because she loves Wagner's "Ring of the Nibelungen" (it simply cannot be loved by definition), but because she does not have a man now, and emotions are needed now - by the way, not without secret hope of him there meet. But when she meets, she will go wherever he says - a happy woman is always more obedient. We all know how pleasant it is to deal with a girl who is all blooming with happiness. Isn't it true that she infects us with her fun? - us, I say, preoccupied with our male problems (sometimes even very serious - this also happens) ... What kind of women will they be if they start "playing on our field" ?! They will become so conscientious, extremely rational ... After all, we ourselves will die of melancholy! Gogol states that "stupidity is especially attractive in a pretty woman." Yes, half of the female charm lies in this unpredictability and irrationality. I just want to say that we should be fair to them too. Like, scold only on business. It may be good that women are limited in some way. But how emotional they are ... Not like some!

47. This time she has no special education, but she constantly climbs into philosophizing, exhibiting "her own" philosophical and psychological schemes, her individual interpretation of the authors. She does not scatter quotes, but she talks a lot. Key words - "I have my own point of view on this matter." It is spoken in a firm, uncompromising tone. I've never argued ...

48. She's very smart. Really smart. In most cases, women have a kind of normal and practical female mind. According to my observations, he is significantly superior in a number of parameters. When we organized some events with my "girl", I often noticed that the solutions she proposed turned out to be much better than mine. More effective, or what ... But here we are talking about a real, sharp and strong mind, which often does not even need a good education. For food, two or three books are enough for him, and some public lectures ...Of course, such a woman will not invent gunpowder anyway - a purely biological (that is, feminine) feature of turning a fly into an elephant will inevitably affect her creative zeal - to get hung up on a small problem and lose sight of the whole perspective. However, intellectual communication with such a woman is simply bliss: she instantly grasps everything on the fly, understands even an unspoken thought ... There is a feeling that you are flying. However, for more than communication, such women are fundamentally unsuitable. For almost a year, I talked like this with my former classmate, Lenka, and almost always on the phone. The communication was just super! There was nothing more between us. However, it turned out that even in the case of simple friendly communication, a woman will still strive to somehow win back on a man. Baba generally tends to take revenge on a man for all his shortcomings. Thus, she is rehabilitated in her own eyes, or something ... This also applies to her mind. Chekhov writes that smart women are hard and demanding. In my case, the same thing happened. Over time, I noticed that Lenka does some strange things - all the time humiliating me in trifles. And then I just got tired of it ... Besides, it's impossible to just communicate with a woman, or just be friends. Over time, she will probably want more. There are no perverted women who value purely intellectual communication over personal relationships. But a super-smart woman is not perceived as a woman! She is perceived as a bearer of intelligence, while a woman, by definition, is a bearer of charm. Because of all this, I decided never to mess with smart women. In any case, a dead end awaits.

49. She is obsessed with esoteric ideas, astrology, or even black / white magic or Satanism. This is much worse than the previous option. Now she is zombified with all these ideas, most of which are simply sucked from the finger. All non-brainwashed and sane are perceived as blind kittens who need to be taught life - even if they themselves do not even know about it. Key words: "egregor" and "astral". The most important word is "path". For some reason, women of this kind always have huge, wide open, frozen eyes. In her entire figure, you will immediately see an undisguised bombast - as it should be for the elect, admitted to the "super-secrets of the universe." Now the key names are: Blavatsky, Vladimir Shmakov and Absalom Podvodny; as a rule, she will also refer to "one person" - most likely, this is her magician-teacher, with whom you have to compete, because he is usually also a lover in combination. Be wary also if her speech contains "Arcana Tarot", "Book of the Dead" and "Book of Changes". In addition to our heroine and a couple of authors, the so-called "mahatmas" keep "super-secrets". And almost everything comes down to the teachings of these latter. According to the esotericists, even Jesus Christ learned from them! Like, the first 30 years ... You have to completely not understand Christianity in order to believe in such nonsense ... In the fall of 1998, I started an affair with a lovely girl who worked no less than a sorceress (that is, in the salon on lapels, love spells). I have already spoken about the fact that a woman should have a kind of normal, high-quality mind. If she's too smart, that's bad. But it turned out that it’s bad if she still turns out to be stupid - because in this case she will inevitably begin to build an idol for herself ... My friend really idolized the head of her salon, like he has a ward, spent 18 years in Tibet, with her Mahatmas jammed vodka ... And I was completely shocked when, in the midst of the romance, she suddenly announced that the next day she would get up very early - they say, you need to go to Church and take communion. The guru told her so - like to recharge with energy to heighten witchcraft ... I replied that it was very good that she immediately warned me - I would cook her a lenten meal, give her literature with all the necessary prayers (which is still lying around idle), I will help you learn Our Father, The Symbol of Faith, I will explain how best to confess before the Liturgy, and I’ll make a bed in another room - you’re supposed to fast before Communion ... Then it turned out that the guru didn’t tell her anything about the prescribed prayers and confession , but allowed me to sleep with me before communion. And in general he approves of my person ...Well, here I was already angry, having noticed that while taking communion in the Church, you need to follow the goals and rules that she herself established, moreover, a couple of millennia ago, and not with the fact that a junkie who came from nowhere invented, and in general - let her chooses whose point of view is more important - mine or the guru ... Our novel did not last even 4 weeks ... Also like sic transit ... That any secret teaching, if it is even in the slightest degree connected with the truth, surely sooner or later it becomes known to the whole society (traitors and defectors among their own, and, in fact, the work of the special services), for some reason it does not occur to all esotericists, and they continue to fervently believe in the super-secrecy of their teachings - and, accordingly, their own super-chosenness (it is still unknown what is primary here). Experience shows that women fall for such a cheap bait very easily ... This means that passion for esotericism is at least a mild form of insanity, as, indeed, any belief in his super-chosenness (this stone in the garden of historical Christianity). To put it more simply, a little silly people take it all. Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Fascination with UFOs also applies here, with the only difference that in this case the wise aliens provided the mahatmas with higher knowledge. As mathematicians say, "now the problem is reduced to the previous one." In this case, she (ladies; she, however, is also a task) will have even more confused speech than in the case of the first, running eyes, small tremors of the upper extremities, severe redness of the skin of the face ... Well, and a little more stupidity ... Yes, however, what I am describing here, all this can be read in any textbook on psychiatry ... You should also be wary if it turns out that she herself is "out of business", but her best friends are passionate about something like that ... Most likely, she has already been "pumped up" with the corresponding ideas.

50. Active participants of some sects also adjoin here. The set of symptoms is almost the same: they talk about their sect (community, church) too inspired and with an unhealthy expression on their faces. They generally only talk about her (and also about their leader). About what cool dudes are there, what a cool faith they have, cool rituals and, in general, "how cool everything is there" (knowledge of women in any religion, as a rule, does not go deeper). In general, I should note that a normal woman with her faith (or a system of values, or just hobbies), as a rule, leaves quite easily - immediately exchanging them for the faith or hobbies of the man she meets. And this is normal - only on this can family harmony be based. Actually, family, husband and children - and for a woman is her true religion. She firmly believes that this is the most important thing in life - at least for her. And you know what? In this she is, perhaps, right. Until he begins to believe that the same should be the case for a man. As a rule, such a transformation of views awaits decisively all women ... And it is precisely because of this, in the early stages of the development of relationships, a woman assimilates the system of values ​​of her man (even if her chosen one is a bandit and a murderer). If this does not happen, then the couple will not last long together. Or they will always squabble like a cat and a dog. You can, of course, try to get the girl out of the sect. But somehow I have always preferred "ready-to-use material". What for? Once she got there, she was initially a fool. Others, for some reason, did not hit ...

51. She is a psychoanalyst. By the way, this is also a sect that Freud tried to found (just few people know about it). If you only knew how fiercely Freudians and Jungians hate each other! This in itself is a symptom, and our caller certainly could not avoid it ... Here you will be constantly put on the shelves. If you are afraid to get to know each other in transport, then at the age of five you spied on the sexual intercourse of your parents, not otherwise (this is the central point of all Freudianism). If you love to run across the street at a red light - this is how it manifests itself ...Who cares what! They will never prove anything to you. Psychoanalysis is faith, and it defies test and proof. Lord, how was Nabokov making fun of all this! Just scream ... Any faith, by the way, is sacred for its adherents, and an attempt to question it causes only anger, and then fierce hatred for the critic ... In general, of all sciences, nothing spoils a woman like psychoanalysis. She forever loses something very important in herself. So, he even formulated that: she loses the purely feminine ability to feel the situation "from the inside"; instead of this sensitivity, there appears the ability to quote the ideas of her "guru" to the place and not to the place. And in general: how old were you urinating under yourself? You are ignorant, how could you not read Freud's Psychoanalysis and the Teachings of Characters? After all, in the same place everything is right about you (you like it, huh?). Your shame is actually connected with anal erotica (in other words, you dragged yourself when you pooped at the age of five, and now you have "arrived" completely). By the way, human morality itself is connected with it (anal-oral erotica) (by the way, from the point of view of psychoanalysis, all this is absolutely irreproachable reasoning). The most offensive thing is that in this "unfolding you" they will be blindly guided by the ideas of some Western school, moreover, they are often understood vulgarly, and without even thinking that a Russian person is in many ways different from a Western one ("Asian gene", a traditional system of values, a different way of life, and so on), and many Western ideas are not quite applicable to it. And for some reason there was no scientific school that would completely adapt Western psychoanalysis to the complex Russian soil - it is customary for us to take Western ideas simply on faith; the example of Marxism is particularly indicative in this sense. But do you know, about reading these mournful lines, that Russia itself is nothing more than a woman in relation to the West - a peasant, and that this has long been a commonplace in the corresponding sciences ?! Take the model of behavior of any woman (her petty vulgar ambitions, her eternal desire to sell herself at a higher price and constant whining so that she will be reckoned with and respected, despite her most absurd womanhood) - put it on Russia's foreign policy ... Further, how to recognize such an aunt (not Russia: this latter cannot be understood with the mind): very, very easy. Even if the lady is shrewd enough to guess that you all of this (that is, written by me, not by grandfather Freud), you know, and will refrain from pronouncing the holy names for her (Karl Jung and Erich Fromm also appear on this list), then everything she will also not be able to refrain from the terms familiar to her. Remember: "sublimation", "repression", "phobias", "identification" "superconsciousness" "infantile erotica". The most important word is "libido" and all its derivatives. As soon as you hear at least two from this list, immediately run. Let her be looking for the same psycho-analyst.

52. Belongs to some artistic bohemia. Intensively (and not from time to time) revolves in the circles of artists, musicians, poets ... Home does not appear at all. These people are gradually developing some strange type of consciousness - blurry, unfocused, or something ... I don't even know what to call it. They ask a question - and don't expect an answer. They do not know how to maintain communication at all - they suddenly ask questions inappropriately, clumsily joke, leave on another topic ... Their value system is kind of relativistic - like "after us, even a flood." The manners show a terrible laziness and narcissism, and even a terrible arrogance - apparently, from the consciousness of his belonging to the "elite". They also have it (both for men and women) to publicly brag about which celebrity's son or grandson they slept with and what he is like in bed. And so on ... This is exactly what my first true love turned out to be (soon after returning from the army).A pure, sublime and still unspoiled boy fell into the net of a brilliantly educated, talented and witty lady from musical circles, who happily "fell in love" with herself. She, you see, needed a temperamental lover 6 years younger ... So: she always boasted that she was in love with her in the third year of the Moscow Conservatory, such and such (now a famous organist), in the fourth year - such and such (now - renowned conductor) that she had an affair with such and such (a famous teacher at the Conservatory) ... Yes, she really taught me a lot - and not only in bed. Communicating with her, I grew enormously ... However, for some reason it was unpleasant when it turned out that they did not really love me ... And many, many years after this story, I called her - I was always interested in the fate of women, with whom I was connected, I myself do not know why. She changed her high principles, which she instilled in me, a long time ago ... Her son, whom I took from kindergarten at the age of 5, and who was still interested in drawing with me, now works as a designer, is obsessed with computer games and Paris ... Like, even the saleswomen there listen to Stravinsky ... Sic transit gloria mundi ... And if I now met such an aunt, I would recoil from her with disgust. And then it burned just like a torch, and her vulgar bragging about her connections with these celebrities just for some reason touched me ... Probably, for their environment, all this is normal. The only problem is that I myself am from a different environment, and my ideal became a Moscow student of the 80s: well-read, witty, with good taste and easy-going ... Oh, yes - and also loving intellectual men. Have you forgotten that this is my own list and I brought it up solely with the aim of showing how it happens in life? And in no case should you forget about it, especially when you move on to its last points.

53. Intensively engaged in oriental martial arts (taekwondo, karate, etc.), or did them earlier, and for a long time. The point is that these are not just combat skills - they are also varieties of religion, they form a certain type of psyche. So: I don't like this type at all. Moreover, there is always a choice.

54. He talks a lot, suspiciously a lot about a "real man". As I understand it, this latter does not and cannot have anything but money, generosity and sexuality. Well, maybe even purely external elegance - a luxurious coat, a snow-white muffler ... In a word, everything is decidedly external. She often complains that real men, alas, are extinct, that now there is no one to love at all ... It is curious that if I began to complain about the "translation of real women" in a conversation with her, she would accuse me of bad manners ... well, and she? Is this a hint? (this has been verified by me more than once). In a word, for some reason, women themselves are annoyed by talk about a "real woman". Hence, we get a funny definition: a real woman is one who does not talk about a real man. However, she may not rant about a "real man", but these vicious tendencies of her, nevertheless, are felt in conversation, like she compares you to herself with a certain ideal; this is also felt in the questions asked. Most likely, she (the caller, not a real woman; in my immodest opinion, only a young girl is a real woman) is overly demanding and not compliant enough. Relationship with her will still not work out. I already had one. We parted with a bang. Now I have developed a scent for them a mile away.

55. Exaggeratedly talks a lot about how a man should be dressed, pays exclusive attention to his appearance. The detailing here can go as far as you like - from the smell of eau de toilette to the shape of the forehead and temporal bones ... Perhaps it took too long to get acquainted with the ads. Or maybe just superficial by nature. However, it may be completely different.... The caller had a voice of a fantastic, unheard-of timbre - I was immediately stunned (exactly the voice of my university lover, including even that aplomb). She studied at the Academy of Slavic Culture (I was just bored by looking through her notes), 18/170/60, and self-esteem was clearly overestimated. I had already passed the set of her interests long ago - Verlaine, Rimbaud, Mallarmé, Blok, Lermontov ... She especially appreciated Oscar Wilde - and for me no one from the English except Shakespeare ever existed. However, like most women, all of her knowledge was not processed into something new, but was used only as a basis for immeasurable pride and greater demands on men. She talked mainly about masculine elegance, and there was something affected in this, implicated in Oscar Wilde ... I had to dress up like I don't know who on the first date with her, pour over the man's "Chanel" ... She turned out to be a miracle how good, elegant hat , stunningly beautiful, thin and graceful hands (since then I have never seen anything like it). She immediately asked for my home. It was clear from her behavior that she wanted to surrender herself at the very first meeting. No, you are naughty! In short, I had an affair with her, and it turned out to be completely idiotic, because it looked like this. She disappeared for a whole week, and hardly even called. I couldn't call her - strict parents carefully guarded the innocence of their daughter, whom she had long lost; unfortunately not with me. On Saturday, at 11 o'clock in the morning, she called already from the nearest metro, and then she would come to just have sex, in which she was insatiable, and adored everything extraordinary, theatrical and spectacular. Then she demanded all sorts of goodies and instantly dropped them off - according to her, to the library. A couple of times we still went to the theater with her ... The bad thing is that I fell for her too much, and suffered all week - where is she, with whom she is (taking into account her arrogance, this was quite acceptable). Perhaps most men will condemn me - they say that a beautiful woman comes to his house and just gives herself up, but I was humiliated by the situation that I fell in love with her more than she was with me - and after three weeks I broke off relations with her. However, such options are too rare. Usually, the reasoning about masculine elegance hides not a passion for Wilde, but a trivial woman's commercialism.

56. Her conversation mainly concerns women's clothing. Speaks only about fashion and about the rags that she bought, will buy or that were "dressed on a woman in the subway." Either she is empty, or her self-esteem is so exquisitely displayed. However, the same applies to any other thing or area of ​​a woman's life. If she's obsessed with her, that's bad. In general, it's bad to be crazy.

57. Completely does not pay attention to his clothes and appearance; basically does not use cosmetics, even rarely visits the shower. Such people usually declare: “I don’t care where to go,” as if the ability to take care of oneself is a prejudice. Almost certainly low self-esteem. One hundred pounds, that her character will be very complex. But perhaps this will also emerge only later.

58. Uses cosmetics of flashy, vulgar colors. Low self-esteem, or maybe just a lack of taste. Am I going to develop her taste?

59. All her previous romances were with people outside my circle. If she says that her former boyfriend was, for example, a truck driver, bartender, hairdresser, bodyguard, waiter, or even a bandit, then she does not suit me - we are guaranteed not to find a common language. The same applies to a manager, financial director, lawyer, owner of his own company ... And also - if he was a Chechen, German, Georgian, Armenian ... Choosing a man, a woman inevitably demonstrates her value system. She always wants her friend to be like her father, the ideal that her parents formed ... If the pepper differs sharply from this ideal, then the relationship will inevitably collapse soon. There will be no mutual understanding.The worst answer for me was that her frame (or her father) was a policeman. These latter, I do not consider for people at all, because once I dealt with them and foolishly behaved like a true gentleman. Then he quickly ended up in a pre-trial detention center 1000 kilometers from his home - in Rostov-on-Don. There was a bike in our cell that it was here that Chikatillo once sat. I suspect, however, that she walked there in every cell ... With me sat the very color of the underworld there - arms dealers, drug dealers, thieves in law (Lord, is our Borya somewhere now?) ... I heard the cries of the beaten, coming from neighboring cells and the corridor. I saw how we were treated there. This humiliating morning chase, when they took away everything that could be taken away - even what was officially allowed to have. I felt in my own skin how the innocent are pressed during interrogations ... "You will go for a steam locomotive with us ..." I strongly suggest that all people of good will tell the daughters of the "garbage" their firm "no", so that their pathetic race will die out on earth. .. Do not even sleep with them ... Let them get to know the cops ... So: the ideal answer for me has always been - "the previous guy is a student."

60. Works with real estate (realtor, agent, and so on). It is not suitable because work associated with occasional, but very large incomes creates a situation of constant stress for the psyche. Simply put - in this everyday gambling pursuit of a good deal, she probably "went crazy". A kind of focus of dominance has arisen in the minds ... Pay attention to how confused realtors have, how their face changes when it comes to a profitable deal. All people love to get money, but in our case we are talking about something pathological. All other types of earnings that provoke financial excitement refer to the same point.

61. Journalist. This is a special article. Imagine the following picture. Honoring the famous ballerina. She, already an old woman, sits on the stage, and in the hall there are her old fans. They saw HOW she danced in 1916 with Nijinsky. It was the time of their - both the ballerinas and the grandmothers - of youth. Yes, that was the time! And what were the men! How they knew how to look after! What costumes were worn! How gallantly they gave flowers! But those men are no longer there, and they themselves are already old, and they only have a few years to live, and some days. And they have nothing but these memories, and these tears - and they are shed by all those gathered in the hall. And you know what I'll tell you - these are high tears. But then a journalist appears. And her first question to the ballerina is the following: "When did you experience your first orgasm?" The whole hall is downright stony ... The general sublime mood has already been destroyed (the sublime in general is destroyed very easily). They try to drive the journalist away, but she swears: “Why did I ask that? I’m from a women's magazine and I’m trying for our readers.” So: all of them are such journalists. Impudent and assertive. And very few people like to deal with them. they are content with advertisements (they called me in batches - 10 percent of all callers) .After all, their genre ... Go to any dating server and see how many journalists there are. But by the very nature of their work they are in constant contact with people. It would seem - why should they resort to some kind of ads?

62. A teacher at school (not to be confused with a teacher at a university). This is also a special article. Lord! How many of them are calling on the ad! And the coolest thing is, all at the same time. I already knew in advance: from 13 to 14.30, mostly ladies of one category call me, from 16 to 18 - another ... For example, strictly from 21 o'clock the nurses started calling from night shifts - 2-3 pieces in the evening just called ... However, back to our rams (that is, teachers). Firstly, they are always a little dull. Do you think we wouldn't be dull, every day from year to year repeating the same thing to a bunch of stupid people? Secondly, the teacher, again due to the integrity of her feminine nature, gradually begins to treat her peasant as a student - to command him, educate him, make comments on trifles ... Such moments are characteristic, perhaps, of all women, but in in the case of educators, they are particularly tedious.They are so tiresome that even in women's magazines (I plowed Domashny Ochag) they are stipulated separately, with the addition of strict advices - look, they say, do not try to tire ... Thirdly, the teacher always needs to check the control ones in the evenings, therefore, you can't get it anywhere. In addition (which, perhaps, the most important), the teaching staff at the school is a real shit. All of them are usually single; they always have some kind of squabbles and intrigues; they always squabble over the only man among them (as a rule, a physical education or labor teacher). Let's now imagine what it is that forms a character in a young virgin ... It is very significant that the women's collective is always a gadyushnik, and in this sense, only the convent is the biggest gadyushnik (this I know from personal experience), but for some reason nuns I never got a call ...

63. She has an unhealthy and aggressive attitude towards the world: everywhere, for the most insignificant reason, she writes to the complaint book, sues everyone, strives to "bring everyone to clean water", constantly swears with the sellers, shakes the rights ... all he will carry with him a pocket scale - so that the sellers do not weigh it. As a rule, these have a heavy, irritable character. In general, the female character cannot be corrected, it is a sin to even try. Only for her feminine goals, a woman at first in a relationship seeks to hide it (character ... yes, by the way, the very sin). She adjusts to the ideal that a man sees in her - and in most cases unconsciously (if purposefully, then she is generally complete crap). However, it is impossible to keep such a high bar for a long time, and then her real face begins to appear. So: the true super task, the highest, so to speak, aerobatics of acquaintance on the phone is to calculate the appropriate intonations of speech at the very beginning, correlate the corresponding traits of her character with them, and then draw up a complete portrait of her, so as to send nafig on time and not waste time for an unnecessary meeting - and all this in a matter of minutes of communication. In fact, it is not at all necessary to have seven spans in the forehead and a super-duper liberal arts education to do this "hell's work" - and the example of my friend fully confirms this. I assure you: any normal man by the age of 40-50 acquires the appropriate discernment. If he meets on the Internet, then much earlier. At this "job", people quickly turn gray.

64. Refers to permanent employment, complete lack of free time. During the day she has work, in the evening she studies. Most likely, he is just lying. When a woman wants to meet, she will always find time. So, he doesn't really want to. Or, for her, her career is more important than her personal life, which in turn suggests that she has some kind of problems with her worldview. But then there will be a lot of problems in relations with her, right? It is interesting that she will remember when she has already learned and made a career; then it suddenly turns out that no one needs it. After all, she does not have any skills at all to build relationships with men, as well as the most important female quality - the ability to give in. She is left with the easiest thing that always comes to a woman's head - command. But men for some reason do not like to be commanded. There are still few perverts among our brother who love such super-independence. In short, why the hell is she so busy? You can find more freedom ... In general, I should note that softness and compliance are the baits that our brother swallows most easily. The meaning of such a bait is that, apparently having obeyed her boy, the maid very often then acts all the same in her own way. That is, her compliance is at the level of some attributes and symbols - in order to show our brother that he is "the master of the house." However, if I hold the royal scepter in my hand, this does not mean that I am the king and autocrat of all Russia. It's funny that our brother calms down on these symbols ...Brothers, how superficial we can be! However, female compliance also serves another, more distant goal. For having first demonstrated her angelic character, having accustomed the man to herself and finally lulling his vigilance, the woman eventually successfully begins to dominate. She completely subordinates his will to herself, and he gradually, gradually, imperceptibly for himself, turns into a pitiful, weak-willed rag, devoid of his own face, his own thoughts, his own motives ... Do you have married friends? Take a closer look at them ... And nevertheless, a compliant woman is still better, since an uncompromising woman will do the same thing, but in a rude, perverted form, with special cynicism and by prior agreement with her friends. Of the two evils, the lesser is chosen.

65. In general, she is excessively addicted to something fanatic - collecting stamps, computers, fitness, traveling, crawling on the Internet, communicating on ICQ ... Everything superfluous in a woman, as a rule, turns into a terrible hassle in a relationship. But in a man - on the contrary. This makes him an interesting person. This is because we are generally very good ... Often a fanatical attitude towards something (for example, if they attend every concert of their favorite band without exception) testifies to the usual stupidity ...

66. Too often (more than once every 5-6 months) abruptly changes his image. She wears long hair, tight-fitting black and does not dye at all. Then she suddenly dyes herself bright red, makes a perm, and wears everything pink and spacious, and her nails and eyeshadow are crimson (her face now looks just like with thyroid dysfunction). Then she cuts her hair baldly and wears some kind of rags. Etc. I was familiar with one such. She lost her mind on the basis of self-affirmation and low self-esteem. I hope you don't get one ...

67. Doesn't know how to keep his simple promises. For example, he promises to call, and does not call back (this primarily refers to the beginning of the acquaintance). Then he doesn't even apologize. It's clear that it's a dark matter - either she has someone else or an unhealthy roof. Or problems with understanding common human morality, which, in my opinion, is completely reduced to an unhealthy roof. That same friend of mine taught me how to act in this case. If she didn't call, then never call her again. Wait until she shows up. If her conscience is clear, then she will call back without fail. If she does not call back, then the light on her has not converged like a wedge. There is also a more decent one. The way, by the way, is wonderful. Especially for raising self-esteem. This is verified.

68. She sends the same standard letter to heaps of addresses. A fool who wants to solve an "easy" problem. I don’t understand, however, what fools respond to such letters. After all, by this we, men, are not respected at all. And if from the very beginning they showed disrespect - what, one wonders, will happen next? Is not it?

69. Having struck up a correspondence, he suddenly begins to hesitate with an answer (he is more than 2 days late), and then answers, as if nothing had happened, and does not even apologize. In fact, a normal girl in such cases not only apologizes for the silence, but also explains the reason - they say, there was no Internet, the computer did not work, the Internet was only at work, and she was sick, sat at home. She is always worried that something will be wrong about her. She is generally worried about your relationship. This is all serious for her. And she can not worry only in one case: if at the same time she is corresponding with someone else, and these two days she met with him in real life. However, she did not like him; so she switched to you. In other words, from the very beginning you were held as a "fallback". That is, they did not put their whole self, their whole soul into a relationship with you. This means that it will be so in the future. And in general, if a lady meets through advertisements, then she doesn't really appreciate each of her applicants.Just think! - there will always be other options, hundreds of people a day "bite" her profile. What is this if not a perversion? In general, getting acquainted on the Internet, it is good to find out if the lady posted her profile anywhere. First, you need to ask her about it herself. Like, I'm interested in your personality, and I wonder what you wrote in the questionnaire. As a rule, women, having heard such words, immediately melt and confess everything ... Then organize a search by her e-mail address. Or by keywords (after all, she told about her hobbies). If she “went into unconsciousness,” and her profile, nevertheless, looms on the site, then we already have very important information about her - that she, for example, is lying. So important that you can no longer correspond.

70. She is passionate about the "scientific approach" to dating. Strictly follows the eastern horoscope (or even the horoscope of the Druids: he himself read in one questionnaire: "I am an oak-bull ..."), all kinds of psychological tests for compatibility, or even the so-called "socionics" - "science" about dating ... In it, each person, in accordance with the test, is assigned his own image (usually 2 or 3 names at a time). Like, they'll tell you that you are Hemingway with an admixture of Beethoven, and, accordingly, suits you ... hell knows ... let's say, Lady Hamilton, or this, like her, little Dorrit. Dickens had such a sucker ... Look for her, they say, among women’s profiles; cloudless happiness awaits you with her until the grave. Any normal person, and even more so a woman (and her brains must, simply must be normal by definition), understands perfectly well that in love there are infinitely many additional parameters - just like the little things in the character of every person. But the little things just determine everything! (for example, the mother-in-law turned out to be a fool). Not to mention the endless number of combinations of these little things. And no super-duper scientific model is able to take them all into account. The first and determining factor in falling in love is the smell. All the latest research convincingly proves that the more different the male genetic code from the female (that is, the more likely they have healthy offspring), the more they like each other's smell. And it is the smell that lies at the heart of falling in love. And this is especially true for women - who generally exist at the level of smells, emotions, sensations, instincts. The real joke is that a woman is crazy about the smell of the upper body of a man, but a man ... (I think you already guessed it). It is curious that the girl I loved in my first year at Moscow State University is now engaged in this particular scientific topic - I recently found her on Yandex. Therefore, "socionics" is a typical example of a bourgeois pseudo-science invented by Trotsky-Japanese spies. But it's amazing how many fools bought it! Fools, however, are generally bought very easily. Now tell me, if you please, what do you think about those fools who dream of finding love through any questionnaire - and even through the Internet? After all, the questionnaire is definitely not able to convey not only the smell, but also the intonation of speech, laughter ... And why then interrogate the dude about all his ins and outs? On the other hand, it has become more convenient for us to choose: if a woman is delusional with socionics, and in general gets acquainted with the questionnaires, then you can safely send her nafig. Or you can just send it - like, you didn't like the smell of it.

71. In the ensuing correspondence, she demands complete, detailed information about the man. This means that she does not understand anything at all. Communication should develop gradually, only then is it high; and besides, what kind of fool, having serious problems (say, with health or with "bad habits"), would honestly talk about them? Finally, in strict accordance with the previous paragraph, any normal girl should strive to switch to the phone as soon as possible, and indeed to meet in person - in order to get the first impression, to sniff her boy ...If she wants to re-write for a couple of months in order to find out everything and thereby be filled with "eternal love" in absentia, and only then meet, then in this case, she is like a fool, devoid of even a grain of normal common sense.

72. She treats alcohol with a special, affected disgust. She basically does not drink herself, and gets irritated when others (at least moderately) drink. All this is argued by the fact that, they say, "harmful to health." In fact, the reason is completely different ... For example, her father could be a bitter drunkard, and now she has - completely, by the way, neurotic - repulsion (in a woman, as a rule, absolutely everything is neurotic). Either her stepfather once raped her drunkenly ... So, her heredity is bad, and her character is there too ... One way or another, no one will just hate alcohol in a country where "drinking is fun" ... All this, significant, is not without reason ... Take a closer look at her: I suppose she doesn't like Vysotsky's songs then. And in the kit - he wants to get out of Russia. She hates Russians; this attitude of hers will soon spread to you. In short, this moment probably predicts a terrible character for us. It is curious that this item was added by me in 1999, and exactly two years later I happily forgot about it and fell in love with just such a person to the point of insanity. The first two weeks the romance was downright dizzying. There is something to remember in nature. Well, and then surfaced ... well, in a word, that side of her character, which was precisely connected with contempt for drinkers. And in human nature, in general, all sides are interconnected; This is especially true for women - creatures by definition complete and whole, like a monolith. Then there was complete horror, which, naturally, ended in a complete rupture. Curiously, on this New Year's Day she nevertheless sent me a postcard; the text could be interpreted as a subtle hint. This means that the unfortunate woman is still drinking the bitter cup of loneliness; from the entries in the guestbook of her site the same follows. And who needs her with such a character? By the way: she still has four cats at home. Her mother was a divorced woman. She always sued everyone. Anyway, according to the sign of the horoscope, she is Capricorn. No, you think: where were my brains? Do I really have them?

73. Disgusted with the fact that people can express feelings and relationships in public places: kissing on the subway escalator, hugging on the bus, and so on. Constantly irritated in such cases. No comments, as this is even worse than the previous point.

74. Does not understand humor and does not play along when teased over her, moreover, slightly. All normal women understand that a man's roar is both a form of expression of attention and a means of self-defense. And besides, self-affirmation, creativity, inner freedom, and I don't know what else is there. In short, we guys are generally super. And this one just has a bad temper. Most likely frigid. As in the previous case.

75. In conversation, he often speaks general phrases, and with some bombast: “The most important thing is respect for a woman,” “motherhood is sacred,” “family is the most important thing,” “children are the flowers of life,” “I’m so I say - the inner world should be in the first place ", or too common folk introductory words and phrases:" as they say "," well, I will speak "and so on. Stupid and limited. In fact, she is stupid (in women this is quite rare - for the most part they have a kind of average practical mind). Perhaps a provincial. Here are the key phrases by which you can identify a fool. To your quite normal question - for example, where does she work, she answers with exactly the following wording: "Is this important?" In such cases, I answered in a mock-sad voice: "Of course not. Happy to stay." Or, if you tell something about yourself, at least sometimes inserts: "Well, well."

76. Loves (downright worships) Alla Pugacheva and Philip Kirkorov. Say what you like, but this is a symptom.In fact, completely and completely reducible to the previous point. Whatever you say, female common sense should complement no less common taste.

77. Laughs vulgarly - cackles or neighs like a mare. Some author (I can't remember who) noticed that a person is most accurately characterized by his laughter. The intonation of speech, gait or facial expression can still be given some "alien" appearance. But laughter is almost impossible to fake. In it, a person is revealed to the bottom. I will say more. Even those character traits that emerge in a woman only later - even they can be immediately heard in laughter. Alas! In women, something always pops up "later." When meeting on the phone, this (laughter, not something that pops up) is unusually convenient - it is enough to make the interlocutor laugh, as soon as you understand with whom you are dealing. Sometimes after her laughter and conversation is not worth continuing. If you want to find yourself a good, unspoiled girl, you just need to listen to her laugh. It should be flat, clean and clear - like a bell rings. This is a smart and deep criterion, believe me. If you are interested in a more or less long-term relationship, then choose a friend for yourself by her laugh, and not by other indicators - height, eye color, face contour, bust size ... I corresponded with one girl by e-mail for two months - clever , lovely, with a sense of humor, non-mercantile ... In the very first telephone conversation she began to diplomatically find out if I had a car. If I had not immediately switched to the phone, then none of this would have happened. Why our brother does not understand this and does not submit announcements with a telephone is still a mystery to me. Nobody will come to kill him. Oh yes, I’m talking about laughter as a criterion. By the way, the opposite is true: if you want to find someone just to have a quick sleep, then look for a lady with an uneven and vulgar laugh. The probability will rise sharply. However, there are exceptions to all the rules.

78. In the first conversation he remembers (or wants to remember) obscene anecdotes, suitable for the occasion, or uses vulgar, obscene words ("penis", "pubis", "crotch", "virgin", etc.). Or suddenly hesitates, ready to say something like that. In this sense, it was much easier for me - the type of girls that I always liked never mentioned these terms. I wonder how I would get out if I met on the Internet?

79. He goes into various household details too much: he understands Finnish enamels, types of transformers for spotlights, lever lock mechanisms, companies that produce sinks and siphons, much better than you know about any fasteners. One of two things: either she works as a saleswoman in the department of the same name, or is infinitely grounded. In both cases, this does not suit me personally.

80. Too fixated on her girlfriends. He anxiously listens to their opinion, shares everything with them. If a carrot is extremely dependent on their opinion, then it almost certainly has low self-esteem: it does not respect itself and is afraid, so it advises even on trifles so as not to do stupid things. However, extremes often converge, and sometimes it happens that a girl thinks too much of herself and wants to maintain this high image in the eyes of her boyfriend in every possible way. It is clear that the flip side of such a desire is the constant fear of falling off your pedestal (not to be confused with the normal fears of a normal girl to fall in the eyes of her chosen one - here we are talking about the usual disappointment). It is generally impossible to stand on the pedestal on your own without outside help. You have to report everything to your friends in order to check each of your actions in relation to "Him". Thus, the lady turns out to be a hostage of a bunch of other women (since we are talking about them here) - their moods, their disappointments, their envy and hidden complexes. And she, for an incomprehensible reason for the male consciousness, completely trusts her friends.So the desire to be on top turns into its complete opposite - spreading out in front of others, and moreover, not always worthy. Notice how gracefully women are able to drive themselves into a dead end. And now let's imagine that this whole pack has been divorced for a long time, disappears from loneliness, and our princess has a man who really loves her, looks after her, gives gifts. Hedgehog it is clear that they, even in their hearts, will begin to envy her. As they write in the same magazine "Cosmo": "How uncomfortable it is to have a girlfriend who is doing well. You cannot call in to her to take your soul away: forever" he "is either already sitting with her, or she is preparing to meet him. You can't call the phone now either - it's always busy. And you can't pour out your soul too much - after all, a well-fed does not understand a hungry person "(I quote from memory). And so (again, unconsciously) friends will seek to quarrel our couple. And, as a rule, they achieve this. This scheme (vulgar envy triumphant in female friendship) is, by the way, universal, but for a lady with an overestimated self-esteem, its consequences are especially depressing. Nevertheless, women constantly step on the same rake. As they write in the magazine "Cosmopolitan", "men - for a while, and girlfriends - forever." And this is truly so for those who piously believe in female friendship! Meanwhile, unhealthy self-esteem is usually formed either in the daughters of prominent people, or in spoiled girls, or in the only child in the family. Or if she is Leo according to the horoscope. This last one should never be neglected. And at the very beginning of the acquaintance, unobtrusively find out who she is according to the horoscope. And if Leo, then take a closer look - at the mentioned subject. Leo loves to feel like the king of animals, that is, to be higher than others. As a rule, to achieve this, the Leo woman has only one way left - to rise in her eyes by humiliating others (you can read any horoscope as a check). I feel sorry for my friends, so we have to trample on men. For some reason, it was the Lions who told me that they wanted to be in the circle of fame, that they wanted an extraordinary man, with super-duper brains ... Just take and type on Yandex something like: "Leo woman, character problems." I personally found myself once in such a story. True, the lady was a Capricorn, but her father was a famous surgeon. She herself called herself not "lioness", but "Leo", which was by no means accidental - she did not really call herself royally. And when we parted, my lady admitted that "all her friends were saying ..." And when after a while she caught herself and began to restore relations, then I asked her: if we get back together, is she ready in case of any of her own doubts to share them first with me, and only then with friends. It turned out that no. In such women, pride is higher than love. So that's it.

81. Has no girlfriends at all. Never been in a fun campaign. Declares that "female friendship" is complete nonsense, since envy, which is organically inherent in the fair sex, nullifies the virtues of such a friendship. The other will always turn out to be more fortunate with men, career, money or looks. And then what? All this is completely true, but only at least one girlfriend should have been. And if they are not at all, then this means that the lady has a bad character, and she simply scared her friends away. Or she is meanly lying, and she actually has friends, but she prefers to communicate with them secretly from you. And if she is lying from the very beginning, what will happen then? And maybe even worse - she has a sluggish social phobia. Well, let someone else bother with her. For example, a medic in the relevant profile. Besides, now I will tell you one very bad thing. Actually, I shouldn't say this, but nevertheless I made up my mind. The fact is that acquaintance by ad is a somewhat artificial thing. There is always a risk that this artificiality will leave its mark on the further development of relations. You always need to be prepared for anything.Well, your friend's friend may turn out to be very much even nothing. Do you understand me well?

82. Overly superstitious. Reads the horoscope for the next week; firmly believes everything that is written there. If it is written that you should not leave the house on this day, he will not even go to visit a sick mother. If others force her to violate the precepts, she becomes irritated. He strongly believes in all signs. If you leave an empty bottle on the table, it launches it in your forehead (sometimes it hits). The diagnosis is low self-esteem. Or a fool. Or maybe both.

83. Absolutely not superstitious. Listen, stop laughing and twirling your finger at your temple. It is my deep conviction that there should be nothing too much in a woman. And if you think that this is not so, then the flag is in your hands. Some healthy superstition only adds poetry to a woman. Remember at least Pushkin's Tatiana. Say what you like, but it is very feminine to guess in the name of your betrothed. What could be more boring than a rationally correct woman? They are all quite correct anyway, especially after 30 ... If a woman is (slightly) not superstitious, then this almost certainly means that there is some nastiness hidden in her. Maybe she's a blue stocking or something. How is it: so that a woman does not believe in fate? It won't! What does she believe in then? In the triumph of communist ideas? The human psyche cannot fundamentally do without faith, and if a lady does not believe in fate, she will believe in herself (and then she is a narcissistic selfish), in money (here she will be outrageously mercantile), in God (here she has a superficial religiosity with her vulgar ritualism and unbearable exactingness towards others). No, it's better to let him believe in fate. It's somehow safer.

84. Pathologically afraid of getting pregnant or getting sick. In the first conversation (let me remind you: we are talking about acquaintance by phone), he begins to exaggerate this topic. In short, he openly manifests his latent phobic reactions (he said something, he was already scared himself). Meticulously asks if I have a habit of protecting myself, how many casual contacts I have, and what is their (casual) contingent. A normal girl should be, firstly, a slightly risky person, and secondly, very perceptive, and immediately sense who she is dealing with - whether he is decent or not, and so on. And finally, she should be at least a little tactful. Otherwise, how does she differ from a man? We are coarse creatures, straightforward ... From all this it follows that she should first go on a date with me, look into my eyes, communicate, breathe - and then draw the appropriate conclusions herself: I will protect myself, or something. And not to interrogate, like this time. If she asks about this, it means that her psyche is completely, in all respects, unhealthy. In short, to her questions I really want to answer that it is precisely from connections with such fools that I always protect myself. Instead, I say that I believe in a lucky star, I do not use anything ("gas mask and a rose"), and in general I sleep with anyone, and I continue to do this even now (that is, even when talking to her). I am choked with laughter and I listen to her next remark with the "Mute" button pressed on the phone: "So you still have someone nearby?" she asks in an obviously dumbfounded tone. “Yes,” I say, releasing the button for a second. She hangs up. I continue to laugh, vividly imagining how she is now cursing "these dogs" (the story, by the way, is genuine). Still, it's a cool thing - meeting by phone. Sometimes I manage to relax. What do you want? If fifty ladies call you a day, and out of them hardly half a dozen deserve interest.

85. Immediately begins to turn to "you", or offers to switch to "you" in the very first conversation. At first I thought that it didn’t matter - whatever you say, now it is customary to address this, and indeed this is a purely formal moment ... It turned out that this is not so.Turning to "you" to an unknown person - whatever you say, is a symptom. For some reason I didn't like any of these girls. Not my type, that's all.

86. The point is the most obvious - drug addicts, alcoholics, prostitutes ... I inserted it here to complete the collection. If you want - add.

87. She worked in the modeling business for at least some time. Everything is clear here, since this is the same prostitution, but in a camouflaged form. In addition, I am a terrifying retrograde, and I believe that a normal woman should gladly undress only in front of her beloved, and she should be ashamed in front of others. You probably think that in our society it is difficult to find a similar retrograde? Yes, they are a dime a dozen ... Well, then all the models are terribly stupid, and the novel in the classical sense is 70 percent of communication. Their inability to carry on a conversation is truly pathological. Do you know why many men are nevertheless ready to contact a model? Out of vanity. And also because sex is more important for them than personal qualities. But on vanity, you can't build a full-fledged life together. We have to blame the disgusting woman's character for every break, not even realizing that the transfer of guilt to another is a typical womanhood ... No, I wouldn’t take it, and admit to ourselves in this superficiality and vanity.

88. She worked (or is working) as a secretary. Almost the same, plus everything - I don't like this profession. Plebeian.

89. The most interesting girls at the beginning of their acquaintance, and even on the phone, maintain a conversation with great difficulty. Firstly, because they experience normal female embarrassment (after all, they are talking with an unfamiliar man, and in general - they called first; what will they think of them now), and secondly, they are now completely at the mercy of their fantasies and dream of seeing how at least a handsome prince. Over time, realizing this, I began to use this criterion with might and main - and never regretted it. This greatly simplified the choice. But this point concerns something else. About women who perfectly support the conversation, and at the very beginning of their acquaintance. I met a very interesting woman in communication. Not communication - but continuous flight! And when we met, she turned out to be an almost written beauty. And she really liked me. But alas! For some reason, she piously hid from me the presence of her husband and child (meanwhile, I asked at the beginning). And these three shortcomings (husband, child and lie) for a woman, whatever you say, are unforgivable. As, however, and excessive talkativeness on the first day of acquaintance. Something, your will, unkindness lurks in women who adore a lot of wine, games, a large society of men who are too courageous in communication ... Such people are either seriously ill or secretly hate others. However, exceptions are possible. Among the women who sat down with me at the banquet table, I sometimes came across real sweets. However, let's listen further.

90. If she uses the following turns of speech in a conversation: "Wait, don't interrupt", "Well, this is your individual opinion", "Are you studying? So you are not doing anything!" "The most unpleasant thing is when they want to remake me"; “I hate it when they’re at least 10 minutes late”, “Why don’t you want to go into business again?” If she starts the phrase very often with the words “unfortunately ...” or when she just often mimics. A woman simply should not say the phrase: "A man should not come on a date empty-handed." This is already implied, but she simply should not say it. In all cases, she is a fool.

91. Here is my own point: the West praises too much and scolds Russia; wants to get out of here at the first opportunity. Pushkin wrote: "Like any educated person, I certainly despise Russia, but it is unpleasant for me when a foreigner shares this opinion." The desire to live well in itself is probably a fairly innocent thing.But so, in a normal way, the need to leave because of earnings should be spoken with a heavy sigh: they say, well, what can you do, since you cannot find a suitable job here ... The West has its very serious shortcomings, and if it does not understand this, then her parents had to explain. In the first case, she herself is a fool; secondly, she comes from a bad family, that is, a fool burdened with bad heredity. So let him look for a fool.

92. She refers to the so-called "earthly" signs of the horoscope - Capricorn, Virgo, Taurus. This is due to the fact that I myself am an Aquarius, and I hate grounded and greedy girls. There is indeed a clear correlation here - you can check. I also hate Lviv. Although among other signs of the horoscope there are complete fools. Lord, wherever they meet.

93. If she is completely serious about the fact that a child can be raised without a father. This means one of two things - either she has very strong latent feminist inclinations and a bad character (both women most often come in the same "set"), and she feels that a normal husband still does not shine for her, so prepares himself in advance for the role of a single mother. Or she generally has problems with the worldview. Like the roof slid down, just a little bit so far. It is clear that in this case we will not find a common language with it.

94. She belongs to the nationality that I do not like. For example, I don't like German women. But that's not even the point. Since "you need to look only in your own clearing", it follows from this that the best relationships can develop only with a girl of your own nationality. I began an affair with a girl from the Caucasus. She was miraculously good, sweet, and completely not spoiled - chaste, bashful, modest ... She had a slender figure and a fantastically thin waist - one could close her fingers around her with almost no effort. Her emotionality was such that kisses made her even dizzy - she could not even stand on her feet. The extent to which she knew how to be gentle deserves a separate description. She knew how to kiss a man's body so tenderly that Russian women did not even stand nearby. They looked like cold herrings in comparison to her. It was a genuine revelation, something phenomenal, like a butterfly landing on you. And by that time I had something to compare ... At the second meeting, all I did was that I envied Caucasian men - if at least half of their girls were so tender. By golly, I would have married her! But the relationship fell apart within a week. It was fantastically boring with her. She looked at me with frozen, admiring eyes and did not say a word. This is probably not accepted by them. So I sit and eat, and she asks only to stand beside, does not even want to sit down. She offered not the slightest resistance, just like plasticine. Her obedience was somehow strangely submissive, as if she was a concubine in a harem. Then I found out for myself that a woman must have some kind of opinion - otherwise the man begins to lose his own identity. Apparently, in the fight against women's opinion, our spiritual strength is growing. It was simply impossible to communicate with her - she did not know how to articulate what was in her soul (she simply sulked silently in case of discontent), and without this, whatever you say, any smallest conflict, even an elementary misunderstanding, instantly becomes destructive for the relationship. We parted with a bang.

95. Have an abortion at least once. The item is originally mine. Abortion is murder. For example, the Chinese do not celebrate their birthday, but the day of conception. In some astrological schools, the moment of conception is taken into account when drawing up natal charts. Finally, the fetus regards as a child the historical Christianity that does not believe in fate at all. Tertullian wrote that "we are not allowed to kill a child either before or after his birth." I have seen women who have had an abortion. I saw their faces, I saw how their consciences tormented - regardless of how effectively they tried to justify themselves.No, it seems to me that already in the first days the embryo is still a person; and he already has his own destiny. And parents are responsible for this fate. I'm afraid it will be psychologically difficult for me to look after the killer. Why did she have an abortion? Did your parents make you? - there was no need to obey. Why didn't she use contraception? Would have gotten drunk on some pills. And why was her pepper not protected? And why did she get involved with pepper, which is not protected? Can't yet? I had to wait. Or learn. There are many ways - including absolutely reliable, although not so pleasant. Find, finally, another, decent guy. In short, in this case, an abortion is evidence that a woman has a whole bunch of big and small problems - weak will, dependence on parents, promiscuity in men. Others did not have an abortion, but for some reason this one did? It's all bullshit, and our fate depends entirely on ourselves. We always get only what we deserve - no more and no less. A woman will have to pay for this abortion several times - so, let me be the first such payback, and send her far, far away. A trifle, but nice. If the child is turned on, then why the hell was he not given the opportunity to exist? What was he guilty of? Did you have to finish your studies? - but not at the expense of murder. Parents would sit. And she really needs her studies? The child needed life more. How about a child's teardrop? Didn't have money to feed? - would find. It is enough to throw a cry from hand to hand into the newspaper: they say, we desperately need children's things, but we have no money! Do you know how much they would give ?! (A girl from the province has the opportunity to paste over all the posts with such announcements). And they would give a bed, and diapers, and bottles, and a bath, and a bunch of clothes, and scales (I personally checked). The world is not without good people. Finally, the very fact that people resisted such a temptation and decided to go the narrow way, and not "wide gates" would take into account - guess who? - God ... The very God in which no one believes. It would help, regardless of this fact. He, too, was not given the opportunity to help. They did not believe it ... And, finally, the climate in the family, where people donated something and did not commit murder, would be just wonderful. I cannot prove it. I feel that way, that's all. You have to pay for everything. But why did not the recipients pay for the pleasure, but its product? Isn't that absurd? I know - you accuse me of maximalism. But what exactly is the problem? Let this killer be picked up by someone not as rigorous as me. Flag in their hands. Let them live, they make wreaths like ...

96. She likes to sit in a restaurant, club or bar; does it very often. Here, apparently, I will have to explain myself again. In my time, such things were not accepted, and therefore I cannot understand in any way, what is it better than walking, communication, and indeed the opportunity to just be at home? What kind of girls are going there? What's the atmosphere? How is this bar typologically different from the usual inn of previous centuries? Decent people never went to an inn; just a rabble always gathered there - first of all, the rabble, who did their dark deeds there (often this is the case now), and secondly, visiting merchants (whose mentality, by the way, was borrowed by the middle class both in our country and worldwide). The fact that a modern club or bar differs significantly in its design and furnishings from an ancient tavern should not bother an impartial observer - the differences here are only quantitative, but by no means qualitative. Spirit and essence remained the same. A tavern - it is a tavern, even if it borrowed from the West drinks, service and furniture. Because of this, he did not become fundamentally different. By the way, what is the West? This is a society where wealth is in vogue, and not other human dignity. And then what is the fundamental difference between the girls from the taverns and the tavern girls? What attitude do they receive there? Culture distinguishes a person from an animal primarily by the fact that a person must exert intellectual efforts in the struggle for his female; this latter succumbs to male harassment after having been shown the cultural merit that distinguishes the male from the rest of the population. Or, to put it more simply, a normal girl may give in to a man in response to real courtship, real attitude, and real feelings.All the rest are just tavern girls, focused on the fact that the surrounding men will only treat them. It is your will, but this is the Stone Age - to be given on the same day just for food. For me, a pervert, it would be humiliating to play on the same field with people seeking to take possession of a female for a trivial meal and trivial obscene compliments. Either way, I always carried the banner of my old-fashioned high and tried to find an equally old-fashioned girl. You had to find yourself a pervert interested in a real novel and a real attitude to yourself. It is absolutely impossible to do this in a tavern. There is nothing strange in the fact that every man wants to find a girl of his type, and in this sense I am no exception. Girls of my type do not visit the tavern, or they go there very rarely, under the bad influence of their friends (as a rule, girlfriends do not exert any other influence). That is why I chose the telephone as a way of acquaintance. And you know - oddly enough, now you can find a girl for every taste - there would only be a real desire to meet. On the catcher and the beast runs. Old-fashioned, by the way, a dime a dozen. Interesting, beautiful and old-fashioned. What makes Mother Russia unique. And to calculate this old-fashionedness over the phone is not difficult (and thereby cut off unnecessary, inappropriate candidates). It is enough to ask - "What bar in Moscow do you like the most?" Taking this question for the normal course of the conversation and not feeling any trick, most of the callers answered me which one. At this point I was twisting my soul and saying: "It's strange. But I often go there too. Why didn't I see you there? And how often do you go there?" The lady, carried away by the conversation and the prospect of a new acquaintance, for some reason did not at all occur to her mind that in a conversation on the phone the word "saw" was not quite appropriate. Therefore, she cut the truth-womb: yes, they say, I visit every weekend.

97. She is a "party girl" who is used to spending most of her leisure time in company. This does not mean that the campaign is all about bitter drunks and out-of-the-box drug addicts. These can be her fellow students, classmates, or "cool guys from the neighboring yard." Once I had a chance to meet such a person. There was a feeling that she was "hooked" on her campaign, as some are "hooked" on the Internet. It was normal to communicate with her only for the first hour ... The problem here is that constant stay in the campaign leads to the emasculation of the female soul (the male, perhaps, too, but I do not presume to affirm this positively). It loses some depth. There is no depth at all in the sense that a chuch will be able to explain the Trinity theology in a nutshell. The depth that many men are looking for in women is the depth of feelings, depth in understanding other people, in relation to them, and most importantly, in understanding (even, rather, feeling) fate. In this sense, Pushkin's Tatiana has always been my ideal. Such depth for its formation inevitably needs some solitude (which, by the way, was especially emphasized by Pushkin). Thus, if a girl (with some regret, and not with pride) told me that she almost never went anywhere, then I was always inclined to view this more as a plus than a minus. Especially considering that such persons usually like older men, with an established system of values ​​and a meaningful inner world. And besides, don't forget that the list is actually mine, but in terms of women, my taste was formed in the 80s. On the other hand, if a girl just sits at home, reads poetry and classics, and basically does not go anywhere, then she will inevitably become a dreamer and, as a result, will develop too much the idea of ​​an ideal man, and therefore overestimated self-esteem (in women, as a rule, these are rigidly interconnected things). Bringing this ideal into harmony with reality and, further, taking possession of the soul of such a girl is not only difficult, but extremely difficult.To do this, you need to have at least a good education, a brilliant sense of humor and good creativity. Therefore, from time to time - at least once every couple of months - a normal girl should be in some companies. However, I spoke here about an extreme case.

98. Having a dog at home, which she herself started. This is also my own point; it probably won't suit you. I'll try, however, to explain myself. First, she (the lady) most likely needs increased protection. Psychologists would call this "increased levels of anxiety." This, in turn, implies that she almost certainly has an unbalanced psyche. But even this is not the main thing. From the point of view of an outside observer, dog owners are extremely strange people. For example, a dog owner cannot go out and walk where he pleases. If there are other dog lovers in sight, then he must certainly approach them; he must now praise their dogs. In this environment, it is customary to talk exclusively about dogs - about docking tails and ears, dog diet, canine diseases; all other topics are considered bad form here. The souls of these people, all their thoughts are completely absorbed in their beast: they think and talk about it all their time, even when they are with a loved one and even at work. For some reason they do not pronounce "fu" when a black monster with a wheezing, heavy breathing rushes headlong at you in the evening gloom, and just when you are walking with a girl. Now the poor thing is petrified all over with fear. The triumphant monster completes its sinister run around you; with embarrassment and horror you gaze at those cold eyes that hate you, in the very depths of which a formidable fire flickers; on mighty crooked paws with insensible dirty claws, on an open mouth with huge fangs, exuding muddy mucus and an unbearable stench. Everything within you has collapsed; your whole life in the blink of an eye now flashed before our eyes; the already timid breathing almost stopped; only the quiet words of Christ's prayer silently fly off your dead lips. The girl is no longer breathing - weak forces seemed to have completely left her ... And then suddenly, through an incomprehensible noise, hammering in your ears, the happy voice of the hostess comes: "Do not be afraid, he will not touch! He is kind!" And for some reason, always happy, and for some reason always mistresses! But the girl was already frightened, and it is strange that no one wants and will not be responsible for her shock. And I always ask in such cases: "What, your dog does not know the command" fu "? Or you do not know it? Or maybe you can teach?" And I see clean and honest eyes, and I hear in response: "But I know that he will not bite!" For some reason, it does not even occur to the dog lover that the girl may not know this. Well, isn't it wonderful? Where is his head and is it really there? Having neglected this point once and contacted the dog lover (however, she sent the dog to her mother then), I had to offer her more than tell me more about my dog ​​five times a day. How to visit the house of such a girl? And how to endure her affection when this shaggy creature puts its nasty paws on your new trousers ?! And, most importantly - where is it from, is this affection? In addition, it can be technically difficult to maintain a relationship with such a girl - you can't even walk with her in the evening. After all, it is already time for her to go home - every evening, you see, she needs to walk the dog. And you should have seen with what haughty look the young dog lover walks in the middle of the night, being sure that now no one will bother her. How much of her lackey self-satisfaction is in her figure! (female complacency, as a rule, always looks very vulgar) No, you just take a closer look! Many authors argue that we inevitably learn the traits of those animals with which we live (of course, cats have always lived with me). It is curious that dog lovers seriously believe that the animal really loves and selflessly protects them - although science since the time of Pavlov's dog is well aware that an animal deprived of a second signal system can only guard a place beneficial to him personally in the pack, which provides him with food. In general, the impression is created that the image of a dog occupies in the soul of the owner that mental "room" that was originally allotted for religion.Taking into account all of the above, but especially the last point, it should be firmly concluded that the possession of a dog will inevitably lead to a sluggish form of psychosis. And what - we, healthy people, should contact the sick now? But their dogs !!! These disgustingly noisy creatures with wet smelly mouth and dirty paws!

99. She is a church-going Orthodox - she regularly visits church, reads out all the prayers prescribed by the church charter, observes fasts, has a confessor. Here we have to meet many inconveniences. First, she will demand to introduce you to her confessor - so that he, so to speak, approved the candidacy. It will definitely not work to start with such a romance - unlike normal girls of the novel, they do not understand and admit only the most trivial matchmaking, which smoothly turns into a pious family life. She will immediately try to churchify you (the desire to churchify everyone and everything is a characteristic sign of the desire for self-affirmation, or, in other words, an unequivocal proof of the weakness of faith, but the Orthodox for some reason do not know about this). She will whip you about going to the temple. Now you will learn about that layer of world peasantry, about which, besides me, no one, perhaps, will write. God forbid you to experience this when your wife obeys, first of all, not you, but her confessor (or teacher, or whatever they are called in this sect). I personally went through this, and made an interesting conclusion. A woman who obeys her confessor first of all, in fact, simply uses him as a screen to cover up her own woman's willfulness. She does not want to do something that her husband tells her, but she has another, alternative authority. And now she begins to starve her confessor to death - they say, father, I just can't do what my husband tells me, that's all. The confessor, fearing that the parishioner will be "tempted" (that is, he will be angry at his intransigence and will stop attending church altogether), in the end he blesses her for everything she asks ... The sight of women being turned by clergymen, and unconsciously for these the latter, makes the strongest impression on the outside observer; Of course, in order to track down this entire vicious mechanism, one must plunge deeply into the pious Christian life, and then emerge from there. But all the same, the most vulgar is the triumphant physiognomy of a woman (for some reason, a woman's triumph always looks very vulgar), when she boldly and decisively sends you now nafig, referring to the will of her confessor. In the future, in all controversial situations, she immediately promises to first ask him. Here the peasant begins to feel like no one, and the confessor - everything. The confessor, however, does not understand that he turns out to be a pawn in a dirty woman's game (a woman’s game is, as a rule, always dirty). A woman should not have spiritual mentors at all. Her husband should be her most important mentor. So, about our nun: be sure to ask if she has a confessor? Maybe she goes to church solely for the campaign with her mom or a friend (whatever you say, this is more often the case with women). If you marry such a person, then you are guaranteed to never find a common language in terms of raising children. Here you will hear complete nonsense - like the best cure for a disease is the sacrament, and in general you need to commune the youngest babies so that sins do not grow in them. For some reason, historical experience does not teach these people that no matter how many previous generations received communion with their babies, sinfulness was never eradicated. So, the methodology was wrong, and something had to be modified. For example, change the letter to spirit. However, in my case, it did not reach the children. All Orthodox Christians began their conversation with one and the same question: was I in a married marriage? Of course, I replied that yes, and not in one, but in four at once.To the perplexed question - how is this possible? - replied that this is because by nature I am heterosexual and at the same time I am the lover of one influential bishop. Here, as a rule, I began to feel like Gogol's Nozdrev, and like him, I began to "carry such nonsense, which not only had no semblance of truth, but even simply had no semblance of anything." As a rule, future mothers would hang up here. Usually, it is extremely difficult even to communicate with such an aunt - her consciousness is completely filled with a specific mess, consisting of fragments of theological and philosophical ideas, individual phrases she heard from her confessor, and most importantly - from what the women said in the church she visited ( Chekhov was dying over this feminine twist - "one woman said"). All this is leavened on common folk traditions and prejudices coming from the Byzantine era, proudly presented by the Christian community in the form of "Sacred Tradition". We are about to hear that all non-believers are heretics, doomed to the fiery hell, since in their cruelty-mindedness they do not want to adhere to the true faith. The most touching thing in all this is that we will not see true adherence to the commandments of Christ here. Nobody is going to give a second shirt to the poor. Quite the opposite. If, for example, an Orthodox mother has three children, then she simply needs a car in her family - to drive the children to services on Sunday. It also happens that, in the name of their comfort, Orthodox Christians begin to rip off the last shirt from the poor (as, for example, my "ex"). It is easy to see that these kind in their own way people simply choose from the creed that which is more convenient for them to perform, namely, rituals that do not oblige anyone or anything, and do not detract from personal welfare. At the same time, it is stated that the grace of God (which, however, actually exists) gradually, in an evolutionary way, by itself and, moreover, without any volitional efforts on the part of the individual "will overcome the rank of his fallen nature." It is enough just to observe the rituals. In other words, this crafty worldview uses one of the highest faiths in world history (possibly the highest) simply as a screen to cover up its common human desire for a prosperous life. It is absolutely impossible to fight this exquisite form of guile and hidden pride - in front of us now stands the entire two-thousand-year colossus of the Christian history of mankind - which, nevertheless, has never been Christian and never will be (in fact, and not in name). So, in the quagmire of all these freaks, we are forced to wallow, having an affair with an Orthodox girl. At the same time, everything stated in principle is not subject to criticism - their (Orthodox) kingdom is not of this world, and since we do not blindly begin to perform rituals, like them, then with our fallen minds we are not able to comprehend all the stated doctrinal heights - while, that one of the Christian authors declared that our soul is essentially a Christian (from which, by the way, it follows that we, "external people" and so, with our soul, can separate the wheat from the chaff). Or, to put it more bluntly, we are nobody, second-class people. So we return to the point where we get to know the sectarian. However, there is no rule without exceptions. Once a girl called me (18/158/55, Cancer, awesome voice, studies in a medical school, loves older men). From the very first second of communication, we felt that we were made for each other. Understanding, empathy - were just super. Then there was almost an hour of real bliss for the mind and heart. We were all like each other. And then suddenly she announced that she was Orthodox. Like, has a confessor, goes to church. I groaned loudly. She wondered what was the matter? He told her that our relationship is still impossible. A real union can be based only on complete mutual understanding, and I am doing in life what the Orthodox will never accept. "With what?" she asked.Then I told her, knowing in advance what she would answer (absolutely all Orthodox say this to me). That is what she said. And she added in a sad voice: "Sorry, but I can't talk to you anymore" (the church charter forbids them even to have dinner with people like me). On that and parted.

Author: Igor Lebedev


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